lavender boy ∘ muke ∘

one

≫ m i c h a e l

class started 10 minutes ago. i was alone, isolated from my peers as always. i trudge along the deserted hallway, my boots thump on the cold tiles. i really don't give a shit about school, in fact i absolutely hate it. 7 more months and i'm out of here.

i ruffle my lilac hair before entering the classroom. mr. miller lets out a soft sigh at my late arrival and simply nods his head towards my seat. i feel eyes following me as i make my way to my empty desk at the back of the room. each table sat two but nobody ever wants to be stuck next to me. it's not as if i like feeling lonely, i wish i had friends but i'm "that weird kid with coloured hair". people simply avoid me and i make no effort to get to know anyone. i'm a shy guy.

i reluctantly focus my attention on miller's droning. i fucking hate maths, the only thing that makes it bearable is luke hemmings. i've been lusting over him long before he announced he was gay. i'm also gay but i haven't made it public knowledge, why would i put myself through the bullying?

when louis and harry first started dating a few dickheads would tease them, harry was beaten to a pulp. you should have heard louis cuss them out, there was lots of sass involved and one douche was bitch slapped. it was iconic.

i wish for luke and i to be like larry someday but i don't have the courage to speak to him. i'm not worthy of luke, he is too perfect for me.

i stare at the back of his perfectly quiffed head and imagine our life together for the rest of class.

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when i get home from school no one is there as per usual, it's lonely being an only child with a mum who practically lives at work.

i decide to take a bath. i fill the tub, retrieve a lavender bath bomb and sink into the warm liquid. lavender is my favourite colour and scent, it's so pretty. but shh, no one is supposed to know that, i'm punk rock.

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after a long bath i decide to order a pizza and watch a film, i was starving and mum already told me she wouldn't be home for dinner.

i flick through the channels as i'm waiting for my dinner to arrive and settle on watching 'the love letter'.

the doorbell finally rings so i jump up and grab some money off the counter before rushing to the door. i swing it open and i swear my jaw drops. in front of me is a hella sexy man who looks almost identical to luke, he's an older version without the lip ring. the boy clears his throat and raises his eyebrow at my gaping. embarrassed, i shakily hand over the money and reach for the pizza. the delivery boy, who's name tag reads 'ben', smiles at me and walks towards his car. i yell out a croaky thank you before slamming my door shut. man, i was not prepared for that.

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i can't focus on my movie after that encounter. my mind is rushing with thoughts of luke and ben. i want luke. i need luke. i need to tell him, i can't keep this inside anymore.

i stare at the movie blankly when it hits me, a love letter, i can send luke a note just like Elizabeth does in the movie.

discarding my pizza i run upstairs to start the note. 2 seconds later i'm running back down the stairs to get the pizza.

back in my room i retrieve some paper and an envelope to begin composing my note.

"dear lucas..."

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so i went straight into it, it annoys me when fanfics take too long to start a story.

i apologise for any spelling and grammatical errors, oh a tense-switching, my lit teacher always complains about me changing tenses. bitch pls 💁

ALSO I LOVE LARRY BUT THEY AREN'T ALWAYS IN THE STORY K SO IF YOU HATE LARRY DW

keep on munching munchkins

i just dont even know ¿ ^