I Don't Know Anymore

Thank you

"Why are you smiling?"

"I missed you." Lindsey says, not letting go of my hand. "You've been away for thirty days, I was going mad not seeing you."

"I missed you too, but I'm happy I did this. I feel thousands of times better."

"You're more beautiful too if that's possible."

"You don't have to flatter me, I haven't been with you for four weeks, we will have sex tonight."

"Gee, I'm glad you could squeeze me into your busy schedule." He rolls his eyes playfully. 

"Where are we headed to?" We've been driving for a while now.

"To the beach."

"Are you serious?"

"Deadly."

"Don't you think I would have first liked to go home, take a long nice bath, make sweet love to you and then think about something like going to the beach?"

"You're going to thank me."

"Confident, Mr Buckingham are we?"

"You love it there, you had your habit healed, now let the ocean heal your soul."

"I'm putting that in a song!"

"Give me credit?"

"I should give you credit for so much more, Lindsey. You've been amazing to me lately, I wouldn't have done this without knowing you're waiting for me, that you love me. It helped me to get through this immensly."

"And I will continue on doing so." 

We drive for a little longer, I'm glad it's getting dark. I don't need any prying eyes.

I entwine our fingers together and we walk down to the water. I take a few steps further, barefoot, letting go of Lindsey's hand for a minute. The wind is blowing and making a mess of my hair, I breath in the fresh air deeply and it makes me feel like I'm new-born. I turn around and walk back to Lindsey, reaching up to kiss him. 

"Thank you."

"What did I tell you?" His hands comb through my hair, then he embraces me and we stand together for a long moment, I would love to stay like this in this very same spot for the whole eternity if I could. 

We sit down on the sand, my back resting against Lindsey's chest, his arms around me, facing the ocean. "How are you?"

"That's an interesting question." I laugh, pressing myself more into him. "I do feel a lot better, but I'm not perfectly fine just yet. Of course, without dealing with cocaine, I spent a lot of time thinking about what happened with Fleetwood Mac."

"I didn't expect you not to, it's natural."

"Did you?"

"Think about it?"

"Yeah."

"To be honest, not that much. It's sad, I loved playing with those people."

My eyes well up with tears, because I feel I'm entirely responsible for Lindsey's departure as well. "I'm sorry."

"Come on, we talked about this. Mick fired you and me, he just didn't realize it."

"But if not for me, you would have been with them still."

"I prefer being with you." I feel him press a kiss to the back of my head and I relax a little. "Was that all that kept your mind busy?"

"I thought a lot about you not being around when I came out."

"That's crazy talk, Stevie."

"A whole month without a woman, I know how extremely hard that is for you!" I say, only half joking.

"Yeah, but imagine how incredible tonight will be."

"What if I just want to cuddle with you and fall asleep?"

"Then we do that."

"You're amazing."

"So are you." 

"I love you."

"More than anything."

I look around, I can't see anyone but us. There's a little devil on one shoulder saying go ahead, but the angel is arguing to not act this stupid. I stand up and Lindsey wants to as well, but I shake my head and he stays proped up on his elbows. I straddle his middle and lean down for a kiss. His hands immediately come to rest on my back, his lips responding to mine. I reach to undo the zipper of his jeans and ease them down a little, thankful that my skirt is like a blanket, covering both of us.

He breaks us apart, slightly out of breath. "Are you insane?"

"I would say so." I laugh, kissing him again. 

Not without some help from Lindsey, we're joined as one and the sensation is indescribable. I take his hands, lacing my fingers through his, I bring them up above his head and press my lips to his. There's no rush, moving slowly, savoring the feeling. 

"This won't last much longer if you don't speed up, baby." He says, gently nibbling my neck. 

"I'm not going to do that."

"But..."

"Just a tiny bit longer. That's all I need..." I say, pressing myself closer as I free his hands and he brings them around me. 

We both end up catching our breaths minutes later, grinning at each other like fucking idiots.

"I missed that too."

"I did as well. I missed all of you."

"I can tell." He winks and I slap his arm not in order to hurt him.

We lie beside each other, hand in hand, for god knows how long, staring up at the sky full of stars.

"If you saw a falling star, what would you wish for?"

"Now... If I tell you, it won't come true." 

"Does your wish involve me?" 

"Everything I do involves you, Linds."

"What are we going to do now?"

"Meaning?"

"We're bandless, Stevie." 

"Is that even a word?" 

"Not only you can make them up, you know." He kisses my shoulder and his eyes remain on me. "Aren't you worried?"

"No."

"That's new. Why?"

"Because I have you."

"We'll make it on our own, right?"

"Absolutely."

"Back to where we started." He turns on his side, facing me and so do I. "Buckingham and Nicks."

"Buckingham and Nicks." I nod and seal it with a kiss.

THE END

Thanks for reading and leaving comments! This story didn't come out exactly like I wanted it to, so I decided to stop it here. Hope you liked at at least a little bit :)