Anchor (Book 1)

Chapter Nineteen

It was starting to rain again so JJ and I decided to leave the park that we drove to. We had a nice time doing boyfriend and girlfriend stuff, but its kind of hard acting all cute if rain is pouring down and it's cold. Most couples would be praying for rain so they could share a kiss, but JJ and I didn't think it was worth it. By the time we reached the sidewalk, it was speckled with water. It wasn't raining too hard, but hard enough to get speckled in a matter of two minutes. It looked pretty, the asymmetrical dot pattern it created. I told JJ that and he said it wasn't as pretty as me. I scoffed, but it made me all warm inside.
JJ opened the passenger side of his truck for me. I thanked him when he got in the car.
When he turned the key, the engine and the radio started up. The radio was playing some alternative song. JJ apologized, saying that his truck was preset to play this station every time he started it up and went to change it to a station I'd like, but I told him to leave it. I felt cliche looking at the window watching the raindrops splatter on it as it played, but it was so relaxing. I leaned my head on the window as the song was nearing the end. Boy, was it peaceful.
"My family asked me to invite you to dinner tonight." He said. "It's just a small gathering, but they really want to meet you." So, he was talking to his family about me. The idea was oddly comforting.
"Sure," I agreed. "I would love to meet them. What time?"
"Five. I'll text you the address."

The car fell silent again until the radio started playing another song. This one was more upbeat than the last. JJ took one hand off the wheel to turn up the volume. He placed that hand in mine and gave it a little squeeze. I smiled. Lightning flashed before us and then it really started to pour. JJ adjusted his speed and kept his eyes focused on the road ahead.
"Don't worry Natalie, this truck can conquer anything."
I nodded but I wasn't worried. I don't know why JJ assumed I had a problem with his truck's ability. It was an oldie, but a goodie. He and I both knew it.

JJ dropped me off back home at three, giving me plenty of time to get ready and change for dinner. Though, it was hard to concentrate with Jannick in my ear.
You can't go. What about Carlotta? What if she gets back and tells us we need to go?
Then, you can tell me through my mind and I'll make an excuse to leave.
I picked up my curling iron and started looping my first curl when he replied.
I guess, but I don't know.. it just seems that Melissa is becoming less and less important to you.
Why would you say a thing like that?
My blood boiled with anger. How dare he?
You told me that we can't do anything until Carlotta reports back. And, what do you expect me to do? I can't hit pause on my life. People will notice and then anchors will be exposed. So, I'm going to eat dinner with my boyfriend and his family and pray that they'll like me, alright?
There wasn't an answer. Sighing, I went back to fixing myself up. It hadn't occurred to me, until I was applying lip gloss, all that Carlotta and Jannick were doing for me. I owed them everything, but I just initiated a meaningless fight with one of them. I suspected time was making me become bitter. The unknown was breaking me down. I'd been moving too quick to make such a revelation, but now that I'd made it, I realized companionship wasn't something I should dismiss. Exclusion was far from helpful and going at this alone was not an option. I yearned for Jannick's presence, but I knew he was too far gone to hear my plea. I messed up yet again in a circumstance that left no room for error.

The fantastic first impression I planned on making on JJ's family would be forced and that was a fact I dwelled on during the drive over. Austin had let me use his car because JJ's house was not in walking distance. I coaxed myself saying, "If you can just make it through the night without any mishaps, you'll have a chance to really prove to them you are the right girl for JJ. Put on a poker face and charm them." My breathing accelerated as I pulled up to the house. There JJ stood, looking hopeful as ever in formal attire, adding even more incentive for me to put on a convincing act. My heels clicked as they impacted with the street. Before closing and locking the car, I grabbed hold of my clutch, which carried my phone and makeup essentials, just in case. JJ met me as I went around the front of the car and interlinked my arm with his like an old black and white movie.
"You look amazing." He whispered, complimenting the purple one shoulder cocktail dress I bought in anticipation for a gathering of this caliber.
"You don't look too bad yourself." I commented, surveying his black button down shirt and pants.
He led me inside where I was immediately greeted by his parents and the sweet scent of vanilla candles.
"I'm Stacy, JJ's stepmom. Please do not call me Mrs. Reed, it makes me feel so much older!" The black haired woman embraced me warmly.
When she let go, JJ's dad approached me.
"Call me Tyler. It's so nice to meet you."
He took my hand and shook it firmly. Not hard, but not without meaning.
I spotted a lean young man with blonde curls similar to JJ's standing back out of the way. I assumed that was his brother Robert and he looked remarkably well after being in a car crash only months prior. He was a little on the shy side, I gathered, when he just waved at me from the corner. Shortly after, we were all sat around a table munching down Stacy's famous beef stew. The conversations stayed mellow up until we were all served dessert. Tyler took a bite of a pie and then faced JJ.
"Son, I've got to make an honest man of you and I know with your girlfriend here, you will be."
I blushed when I heard this because that meant JJ wasted no time telling them about the change in our relationship status. His dad went on.
"I found some pills under your bed..."
He paused and I wasn't sure what he was talking about, but I didn't interject.
He couldn't be more direct when he asked, "Jordan, are you using again?"
I put my fork down and my mouth opened slightly. Beside me, JJ tensed.
"Why did you have to bring this up right now, dad? We were having an incredibly perfect evening."
"I already told you why. You can't lie here and surely if you did, Natalie could counteract that."
At this point, I felt so out of place I wanted to hide. Why was I being thrown in the middle of this?
"She knows nothing about this. Nothing." JJ spoke through gritted teeth.
"Tyler." Stacy barked, warning him.
But, JJ's dad pressed on. "She doesn't know?"
JJ shook his head fiercely and I got nervous. What wasn't he telling me?
"That's so unfair! She doesn't even know what kind of guy she's getting involved with." Tyler bellowed.
"JJ.."
Those words had come out of my own mouth. I don't know why I did it, they just sort of fell out.
"Haven't you ever wondered about the scar on his head?"
I found myself nodding my head. No! I didn't want to do this.
"Look at the girl!" He exclaimed, rising up from out of his chair. "She's so confused. You're just going to leave her in the dark?"
"JJ.." I repeated, but he said nothing.
"Well I won't!" Tyler raged.
"Dad, don't." JJ warned, getting out of his chair as well.
I felt like I was amongst giants now and I was getting smaller by the minute. Meanwhile, Robert just continued eating silently in the chair next to his father's.
Stacy tried to interrupt again, "I thought for one night we just wouldn't do this! Stop it."
JJ and his dad were leaning across the table getting in each other's faces. Both were blinded by anger.
"Natalie-" Tyler started.
But the dishes flew off the table before he could say anything more. Plates, cups, and some other fragile items shattered and when all was quiet, Stacy sighed, rolled up the table cloth and set it on the now bare table. The fighting ceased and both Tyler and JJ fled different ways. After an abundance of apologies, Stacy thought it was best for me to leave and while I agreed wholeheartedly, I wasn't going to leave without speaking to JJ first. I yearned to know why things had gone so awry and more than that, what secret he was hiding. I spotted him quickly on the back porch, staring curiously off in the sky. Before sliding open the door that led to it, I took in the beautiful starlit night and wished dinner could've mimicked it. I stepped onto the porch timidly because I couldn't predict the outcome of this conversation. Hearing my entrance, JJ craned his neck and smiled weakly when he caught my face
"Well," He sighed, "I certainly pictured tonight going a lot smoother."
With a subdued giggle, I joined him at the railing. "Trust me, I've gone through plenty of strange dinners."
"Yeah?" He challenged.
"Mhm." I confirmed. "What are you looking at?"
"Sometimes, on a starry night like this one, I pick out a star and pretend it's my mom."
"It might be," I replied, then pointed at the brightest one. "Like that one. I'll bet it's her."
I remembered the discussion I had with my brother and recited it, "My brother and I think the smallest, brightest stars are people that passed too early, like your mom. Their redemption is that they get to shine the brightest in the afterlife,"
Like Melissa.
"I never thought of it that way before. I love that."
After a few moments of silence, he apologized again. I put a hand on his back and he turned to face me, his blonde hair swinging when he did.
"Do those fights with your dad happen a lot?"
"Yeah, almost every night." He admitted sheepishly, "It's never gotten this bad before." His eyes flitted over to me and his concern for my well-being was evident.
"It's okay, I'm okay." I assured him.
"Thankfully." He remarked under his breath.
"So, I need to know." I said.
He knew what I was getting at.
He drew in a sharp breath and exhaled slowly.
"Okay," he submitted, "But you're gonna think I have serious problems."
He stared back into the night as I replied, "Try me."
I listened to the crickets chirp as I waited for him to speak. When he finally did, I turned my entire attention to him.
"After my mom died, things were kind of rough for me. She got me through everything. She was my rock my..."
He trailed off, trying to find the right words, but I had the perfect one.
"She was your anchor." I said.
He nodded, "Exactly. I didn't know how to do things without her. I started lashing out- at everything, my dad mostly."
That explained the fights.
"Anyway," He pressed on, though it was apparent in his face he didn't want to. "One night, I went too far."
"What do you mean?" I asked, lightly, putting my hand on his, which rested comfortably on the rail.
He loosened at my touch, but grew rigid again not long after.
"My dad wanted me to tell you about my overdose." He spit out shamefully.
I said nothing, absorbing the information. I tried my best to seem unaffected, but it was tough. My heart ached for the pain he must have been going through at the time to execute such a heartbreaking action. Tears brimmed my emerald eyes and I forced them back.
"I overdosed on my dad's prescription pills and passed out, banging my head on the bathroom sink on the way down."
He flicked his hair out of the way, "It earned me the scar."
I flinched, putting myself in his place. All I could do was hug him. He tightened his grip on me.
"I'm okay Natalie. Don't cry." He cooed, rocking me back and forth. At his words, I felt a tear stream down, wetting his nice black button down. Before this, I hadn't even noticed I had started crying. Softly, I pulled away from him.
"Sorry." I muttered.
"It's alright. This shirt's old, anyway." I knew that wasn't true, but I appreciated his lie right now.
"I need to tell you something." I abruptly started.
JJ looked at me with wondering eyes. "What is it?"
"Remember when you first visited me in my room that afternoon?"
He nodded.
"Well, do you remember the sentence I never completed? The one I told you I didn't feel like discussing?"
Again, he nodded.
"Well I think I can tell you now."
"Natalie, you don't have to-"
"No," I corrected, "I do. I've been leaving you in the dark too and your dad's right JJ; we can't make this relationship work around lies."
"Okay," he finally said, "You can tell me anything."
"I had an older sister," I started. "Her name was Melissa."
Then I proceeded to tell him everything leading up to her death. He listened and without saying a word, pulled me into his arms again.
"I'm so sorry." He muttered into my hair. "And I'm equally sorry for tonight."
"Don't worry about it." I assured. "But I should be getting home."
He sighed and released me. "I guess you're right."
JJ took my hand and led me back through the house. We walked past the dining room and I could hear faint murmurs of Stacy and Tyler fighting in one of the back bedrooms. I shuttered. I hadn't foreseen this night going so awry. Robert, who had been cleaning the mess, looked up.
"You leaving?" He questioned quietly.
JJ scoffed, "Well of course she is. It doesn't do her any good to stay around here."
Robert chuckled, "You're right, sorry bro."
"I think I'll stay a little longer to help you clean up. I insist." I stated.
I bent down and began picking up the shards of glass and placed them into the trash can Robert had fetched. When Stacy finally re-entered the room, the mess was almost cleaned up. She glanced in my direction and sighed, but she did not say a word. Tyler came out seconds later and motioned for JJ. I watched as JJ got up slowly, walked to where his father was standing, and the two embraced. This all happened in silence. When JJ pulled away from the supposed tender hug though, his eyes were somber and unfulfilled. I somehow had a sneaking suspicion that this moment of peace between them was more routine than sincere, that it will be ruptured the following night.

Shortly afterwards, JJ was walking me back to the car. When we approached it, he stopped me and positioned himself in front of me.
"Again, I'm really sorry." He muttered softly and the look in eyes became even more soul crushing.
"Hey," I cooed, lightly taking his hand in mine, "You are not what makes you broken. It is not your identity. You are a work in progress, but we all are. You are smart and sweet. That's what I see." My voice indicated not a doubt in my mind.
His eyes sparkled then and all the events from the night washed away. It was just me and him and I liked it that way very much.

Austin's car started down the road back towards my house. I had every window down, soaking up the cool night air. It was peaceful, but only for a moment because my thoughts began to roam unwillingly. Now that the stress of meeting JJ's parents was over, I could revert my mind back to the chilling information I received before leaving and the harsh conversation I had with Jannick returned too.
I'm sorry. I thought sheepishly, expecting no reply.
It's okay. Jannick responded almost immediately, but can you pull over so we can talk? I've gotten an update from Carlotta.
As soon as I pulled the car over, Jannick appeared in his human form in the passenger seat beside me. The sight of him startled me. He looked utterly worn out. His hazel eyes were dull and adorned with deep, dark bags. His spiky hair looked disheveled and unkempt. I don't know why his appearance shocked me so much. I know how close he and his sister were and to not have her near, when he was so used to having her right by his side all the time, had to be taking its toll.
His eyes met mine before he spoke and I couldn't detect anything else in them but one thing, absolute fear. Then he said shakily, "They found her."
My breath caught and though I had no clue who 'they' were, I mirrored his fear and I asked the question.
"Who?" I whispered, "Who has Carlotta?"
"I didn't know she was going to go there. If I knew I wouldn't have let her... I didn't know-" He trailed off frantically
"Jannick, who has her?" I repeated my question again anxiously.
He paused longer than I wanted him to before saying, "The banished in black." He responded coolly.