sweet sin (the devil all the time)

13. shells

I opened my eyes hearing clicking "arvin" i sat up now seeing him putting bullets in the cartridge "arvin" i put a hand on his arm

He turned around and kissed my forehead "you answer all their questions i dont want you getting in trouble"

I stared at him "your not going anywhere i wont let you" i wrapped my legs around his waist

He stood up and i clung to him tighter "a-arvin i swear to you if you go ahead and do anything stupid i will completely disappear, ill move and change my name so youll never see me again" i clenched my fists

He unhooked my legs and turned around to face me "i love you" he whispered

I gripped the sides of his jean jacket pulling him down to my level and kissing him "ill say it back in an hour when your here and i know your safe" my lip quivered making me bite into it

He kissed me again "i love you slone" he grabbed the gun off the nightstand and turned around

"Arvin please" i clenched my fists "please dont go"

He locked eyes with me and slightly smiled going out the door and shutting it

I felt zoned out, i wanted to run after him, to grab him, tell him were going to figure it out together but i couldnt make my feet move, i was frozen in place

The sound of the front door shutting brought me back into reality, i looked around the room grabbing my shoes, along the lake its the quickest way to the church

I let out a breath, okay, okay, i looked around the room for anything else, okay, i swallowed hard opening arvins bedroom door

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I walked up the steps trying to stay as quiet as i could

"Excuse me" arvin cleared his throat "excuse me preacher" he paused "you got time for a sinner?" i heard a book close "Ive been doing wrong and i want to get right by the lord"

"Well thats what im here for" preston said

"Ive done...lustful acts"

"Yeah that can be a big problem specially for the young people...go on then tell me about it"

"I got me a pretty wife at home, one that'll do pretty much anything i ask but i treat her real bad"

"When you say anything what do you mean?"

"Just what i said" arvin paused "sometimes shell be goin down on me with...well you know her mouth" he let out a shaky breath "heck i get so excited i start forcing it"

"She ever puke on you?" Preston paused "they got a little trigger back there in their throat"

"Yeah well that aint my problem"

"Well then whats the problem then son?"

"This guy I work with, has got himself a daughter, Real young thing, just started high school, One day I got this girl in my truck and I drove her out into the sticks and I...had my way with her"

"Did she put up a fight?" The knot in my stomach was a mix of rage and disgust and disbelief

"No But, you see, the problem is, is...
once I'd had a taste, I just couldn't get enough, I kept taking that girl there
any chance I got, So I'd strip her clothes off, But I'd make her pray
before we got started"

"Why don't you take that hat off, boy"

"Sometimes I'd even...keep her panties, Now, I'd just...sniff 'em as she rode off on her bike, And then I'd go home to that whore of a wife of mine
and make her bake me a cake like I was celebrating"

"What in the hell is this?"

Arvin cocked the gun

"You've been spying on me, boy?"

"I've been watching your every move
for the last couple weeks, You can't get enough of that Reaster girl, can you?"

Preston inhaled

"Is that how you did my Lenora too?"

"So...Mrs. Russell's boy? All right,
Don't do anything you'll regret, son
Why don't you put the gun down and...we can talk all about it"

"Go ahead and talk"

"It wasn't my fault" preston scoffs "And Lenora...was just like this...
this Reaster girl, She wouldn't let me be, But I want you to know that I-I pray for that girl's soul every night"

"Do you pray for her baby's soul too?"

"Look, I didn't have...nothing to do with that, She came to me...-saying she got that way from a boy-"

"Don't fuckin' lie to me!" Arvin snapped

"Lies-" preston chuckles "The lies-The lies are hers, She got it in her head
that I was the father, That I was gonna take care of everything, God dammit, boy!"

Arvin cocked the gun again

"Listen to me! I ain't gonna take the blame for no bastard child! It would ruin me, man, You can understand that, can't you? Hell, Listen to me, boy, She was delusional, She was crazy, You see?"

"No, she was just lonely"

"No, man"

I flinched at the gunshot, i opened the door, arvin pointed it at me "its me" i said

Preston groaned

Arvin stood over him firing a few more shots

"Please, God! Please, God!

"Fuck" arvin picked up a shell "Fuck!" He dropped it "Shit" he bent down looking under the pews, i looked under the other ones "Shit" he was breathing hevily, he bent down looking under both ways, he sat down trying to steady his breathing

I sat down beside him putting the shell in my pocket "why are you still here and why the hell are you so calm?" He asked staring straight forward

"Maybe im the devil" i said sarcastically "come on" i stood up walking toward the door, when the adrenaline hits me its going to be horrible i know that much

"You are not coming with me" he said getting his breathing steady standing up

"Watch me" i walked out of the church going to his car and opening the passenger side

"Stubbornness aint attractive slone" he followed me out speed walking

"But youll put up with it because and i quote 'i love you' oh and by the way" he met my eyes "i love you too"

He shook his head getting in the car and starting it "your insane"

"And im all yours" i said sarcastically and smiled at him

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