Stranger feelings ✔️

#23

I was floating, maybe in the air or water, I don't remember correctly. But I could feel my hands and legs drifting free, as in a vacuum. The feeling of feeling free from all the chains, a place where there is no hope or light, just darkness that embraced me.

I saw different images as I floated. My memories. There was a girl, a bunny eyed boy who smiled and laughed. Those brought a smile to my face too, I had some beautiful moments in my life.

As the images morphed, a new person emerged. I was still walking on clouds. The person stood away from me with a gentle smile on his face.

I reached him and touched his cheeks with both my hands. His smile widened and chuckled, placing his bigger palm over my smaller ones. He bent forward and touched his forehead with mine.

It was peaceful. The gentle lights around us, creating a halo for him. He looked divine; Taehyung.

A few tears escaped my eyes, which brought confusion to his face.

With a sad smile, he said, "I'm here. I'm here. Don't cry. Open your eyes."

"Hana, I'm here. Open your eyes. Please open your eyes." It was not the voice that soothed my stormy mind. This was a woman.

I tried opening my eyes, but the lights were too blinding. The white walls around me were not doing any help either. Above all, the windows that let the light flow in like the cool wintery breeze.

I could feel a pair of hands pressing against mine. Holding onto me as it depends on their dear life. It's too overwhelming that I don't have a proper priority in my life now. Someone I wanted to be my top priority is not with me anymore. How can I be someone's priority?

Taehyung. He brought the crashes of waves in my broken heart. Though it was not his fault. He did not ask to get tormented by this cruel world, by the people who just think of themselves before the others who believe them; someone like Witzie. It was my fault I made him like this. My fault that I couldn't be of his help when he wanted me to. My fault that I couldn't recognize him when he wanted me to be by his side.

I am not worthy, I can never be the same. How can I ask anyone else to be with me when all do is to hurt the ones with me?

I cannot help but love him, even more, when the truth that he is not with me anymore is engraved everywhere.

Those stranger feelings; love. I was in love with Taehyung; I am in love with Taehyung, and I will be. I don't think anyone will ever get that spot in my heart so effortlessly as he did.

Love is a strong word!

"Hana" The voice pleaded. Shenaya it was.

I hummed in response. I did not want to see the light anymore. It's too bright. I wish to be in the darkest corner of this universe.

"Hana, please open your eyes!" She was crying. Her voice was hoarse, and she was sniffing occasionally.

"Taehyung" I mumbled.

"Hana!" She raised her voice.

My heart broke, again and again, those words; his name. It was too painful to say and to hear. The pain was too excruciating. I turned to a side and hugged my knees, pressing it hard against my burning heart.

"I don't want to live, Shenaya!" I screamed at her. All those pains, taking its toll on the already berserk mind.

"Why? Do you want to leave me alone?" She whispered as she patted my head.

"Him. I'm the reason he had to go through all those. Now we don't know if he is alive or not. I don't deserve to be alive. Let alone breathe this air. He deserved more the life that he lived." I couldn't speak anymore. The pain was too much for me. It was as if the fire in my heart was spreading to all my veins.

"No! Zargon's here. He wants to speak to you. Make the conclusions after that." She stroked my head, parting the hair that stuck onto my forehead with all the sweat and tears.

I did not have the stamina to speak. Understanding what I wanted, Shenaya called Zargon inside the room.

With little to no commotion, he sat beside my curled up body, making me sit on the bed. The weight in my head was too much, it kept dropping. The pain was a reason too.

"He's alive." Two words, like a lightning on the darkest night, created unknown impulses in my nerves, making my search for any negative expression on his face.

"Shall I explain what happened after you passed out?" He continued, for which I eagerly nodded. That pain was dying.

"Two of the guards who escorted you here were mine. They entered right in time to the room where you were. They brought Witzie to where I was. With some creative techniques, he spilled the beans. Taehyung's location and condition." He smiled at the end of his briefing.

"Where?" I was anxious. It's been nearly a few weeks since all these happened. I was done with these and I wanted Taehyung by my side.

"I'll take you there. But-" Without waiting for his next words, I leaped down the bed they gave me.

I reached the door and turned at Zargon, whose eyes were as wide as the saucer.

"Aren't we going?" I asked.

"Get some rest first. All those happened to you was your stress and panic attack." He walked up to me.

He chuckled at my bewildered expression. "You know what those stranger feelings are now, do you?"

"I do," I confessed.

~^_^~