🎶You can pretend you don't miss me
You can pretend you don't care
I guess being lonely fits me
And you were made for beg and stay 🎶
This is my favorite Billie Eilish song. She gets me. Fills the holes in my heart. Makes me feel safe and warm. Funny really, most people call her music depressing but it does the exact opposite for me. It makes me feel. Makes me know. Makes me happy.
I love my boyfriend so much. He's been the best emotional support for me through it all. I wonder time and time again if I should sleep with him to show him my appreciation. Not because he has ever mentioned it or anything but because I feel I owe him so much because of how perfect he's been to me. What if he turns me down? I'm just being silly. I shouldn't sleep with him as payment. I should do it if I want to.
Good night Diary....
