To The Guy Named, Fern Silvestre (TTGN #1)

FERN 95

My Diary
December 05, 202*

Dear Diary,

Hindi ko alam kung paano ko uumpisahan isulat ang mga nilalaman ng isip ko ngayon. Hindi ko alam kung paano pagtatagpi-tagpiin ang lahat.

Last week, I was overwhelmed by the thought of working in their company. Lalo na ako pa ang team leader na napili kahapon para irepresent ang team namin.

Doon palang ay apektado nako. What more if nalaman ko kay Mommy na imemeet namin ang family nila because my brother is in relationship with his sister? I am nervous.

Kung di lang ako pinilit ni Mommy, hindi ako sasama. But all that was worth it kasi Damon's nervous face was priceless when Tito Bernard fry him with awkward questions.

Everything was smooth. Hindi ko naman kasi kailangang kabahan kasi nasa abroad naman 'yung taong dahilan kung bakit ako kabado.

But that dinner wasn't for Damon and Aleyna's legality as a couple but the arrival of Fern Silvestre. Hindi ko alam kung anong itsyura ko noong makita ko siya.

I was shocked. I was surprised. Magulo ang naging epekto nito sakin pero mabilis ang tibok ng puso ko. My heart was aching because it knew that he was the man I never had.

We could have been if it weren't for my indecisiveness. We could have been if it weren't for the bad timing.

His physical attributes didn't change that much. He still has spiky hair and that unextraordinary eyes. Bagay na mas nakapag-attract sa kaniya.

For the past three years, I've finished the book I've been writing that was inspired by his eyes. It was painful to think it was him, but I've managed because there was the time I missed him and that was the only thing I could do: to write it, to write him.

I'm not a good writer and I'm not passionate about it but I appreciated those readers who liked it. They are the reason why I self-publish my book. Holding the actual book, makes me reminisce.

Anyways, I have a zoom meeting with my girls. My virtual friends who helped me cope up when I needed advice. They were right when they said I shouldn't tell Fern my regrets--because look how successful he is off today.

I am happy. I am glad to see how we have become. We might not end up together, but at least he became part of my life and I know to myself that a real mistake is when you never learned from it.

-Kayderine Sharia Alcalde