Kiss me

Seven

Dear diary,
Today is the day.
I was dressed in a white gown with silk accents and a laced bodice.
Maids called me beautiful as they helped Jen with my hair, plucking blossoms from the tree right outside my window and sowing them into my long brown twists before placing me in sapphire jewelry.
"You look divine Princess. The most beautiful bride there is." Jen dusted me off while smiling.
I said nothing and twisted the golden band around my ring finger violently as I tried to hold back tears.
"We can only imagine the excitement going through your head dear." One of the maids cooed. The others laughed in agreement.
They're right. They couldn't imagine it.
None of them could imagine wanting to be in the arms of another woman as she read her chapters of an infamous play about forbidden love.
None of them could imagine the idea of wanting to share secret kisses with a woman when no one is watching.
None of them could ever imagine being hopelessly in love with a woman while being forced to marry her brother.
"Spare us a detail of one of those thoughts." Jen begged.
The others begged along with her.
I gave them a small smile and stopped twisting at my ring.
"I can only think of how well he will run this kingdom." I said.
"With you right beside him!" One of the maids cooed again.
I nodded softly and went back to fiddling with my ring viciously.
The commotion downstairs grew louder.
There was music booming from our grand piano and many voices chattering and laughing.
The party has already started.
The maids enveloped my waist with a pearled corset before tying it tightly, making he gasp desperately for air as it altered my form.
"Ready princess?" Jen asked. Twinkles of excitement danced in her doe eyes.
I smile and nodded before stepping into my heels and made my way to the party.
The sounds of music and chatter combined grew louder and more obnoxious as I paused at the top of the grand staircase, looking down at the masses of people.
They were dancing, eating and talking amongst themselves.
I spotted Billie right next to Finneas where two golden thrones were placed.
She dressed in an all black gown and had jewelry with red rubies all over them.
She looked absolutely ethereal I couldn't possibly take my eyes off of her.
Someone in the crowd hit their spoon against their cup of wine which alerted others to do the same, eventually resulting in complete silence within the room.
"Good evening everyone!" A noble man spoke at the top of his lungs from the bottom of the staircase.
"Today marks the wonderful day where Prince Finneas from the Kingdom of Rae will marry our beloved Princess, intertwining our Kingdoms into one and starting the era of an EMPIRE!" The man yelled, earning a roar from the crowd.
"And because this day also marks their marriage, this is the day our dearest Princess becomes a QUEEN!" The crowed cheered again, this time looking up at me.
"Your highness, please make your way down and take your seat next to your King." The noble man spoke once more, looking up at me.
My eyes never drifted off of Billie.
While holding onto the banister, I carefully made my way down the steps as the cheers from the crowd got louder.
Billies eyes finally met mine and the widest smile glowed upon her beautiful face.
I smiled just as hard.
The noise around me became muffled as I made my way close to both Finneas and Billie but never taking my eyes off of her.
"She's madly in love with him! She can't even keep her eyes off him!" Someone screamed in delight.
Billie's smile never faded as I got up on the steps that led to the thrones.
"Good noon." I mumbled softly to her before curtsying.
"Good noon." She replied and curtsied back.
Finneas took my hand and bowed before helping me sit on one of the uncomfortable thrones then sitting on the other himself .
"LET THE CEREMONY BEGIN!" A voice cried from the crowd.
The clergy appeared from the sea of bodies and made his way over to us before asking us to stand.
"Do you, King Finneas from the Kingdom of Rae, take our beloved Princess from this here Kingdom as your Wife, your Queen, your loyal partner and the love of your life?" He began with a firm look at Finneas, daring him to say no.
Finneas took my hands and looked into my eyes.
He was smiling but his eyes were filled with sorrow.
"I do." He said.
"And do you, our cherished Princess of our well respected kingdom, take Prince Finneas from the Kingdom of Rae as your Husband, your King, the ruler of your heart and mind?"
All eyes were on me.
My gaze drifted from Finneas' sad begging eyes to over his shoulder where Billie stood, shifting nervously.
In her eyes I saw love.
True love.
The love I wouldn't receive from being married to this man.
My hands twitched in the warmth of his as tears began to well up in my eyes like when he proposed to me.
I can tell that she was close to crying as well, her shoulders were shivering but not a single tear rolled down her cheeks.
"Princess?" The clergy broke our gaze.
"I-" I breathed out, taking one last glance at Billie before looking down at the hand she would always kiss before bed.
"I do."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jen
"I do." The princess said placidly.
The entire population of the Kingdom roared, their screams echoing and bouncing off the marble walls causing the ground to shake slightly.
I clapped in delight but I knew the princess herself was not happy.
I've realized she never truly fancied Finneas, at least not in that manner, and took up a liking to his sister instead.
I've caught onto their random meetings in her room or awfully close physical encounters at the dining table when they assumed no one was watching.
One day, while she busied herself in the library with Billie in the west wing, I took the chance to clean her awfully messy room and found a small portrait of the Kings sister under her silk pillows.
I thought it was rather peculiar that she had a random painting of Billie hidden in her room but I thought it was even more peculiar that the entire painting was opaque in color and had exquisite detailing except for her lips. It was rather dead and lost any trace of detailing for a reason I cannot bring myself to decipher.
I knew they liked each other but I was in no place to encourage a relationship that went against the rules of the Kingdom.
Not only would their love halt the progression of an empire, but it would also leave the two of them hanging with a noose tied tightly around their necks and I did NOT want to be responsible for the death of one of my closest friends especially since I myself will soon be found in a similar situation.
I was hopelessly in love with the Jester named Rory.
She travelled from Palace to Palace with her family, putting on amazing shows that wowed the crowd and kept their eyes glued to the act, but she was old enough now and preformed solos.
We met right when my mother was sold away to another Kingdom and she made mourning bearable.
Never calling me by my name, just by forms of endearment such as "ethereal being", "my beauty", "darling", and more.
She became my friend and soon my lover when we kissed at a local garden when no one was watching.
She left right before the passing of our late King and I haven't heard from her since.
When I heard of the marriage party, I took it as an opportunity to invite her to the palace and selfishly hold her in my arms once again for no one would question my excitement to see her at a grand party.
"GOOD EVENING GOOD PEOPLE!" She began her performance.
My heart flew out through my rib cage and onto the marbled floor as she looked at the crowd, pulling out a long sword from thin air.
The crowd cheered hysterically, taken aback by her tricks.
She placed the sword above her head before placing the tip of the blade against her opened mouth, slowly sliding it down her tongue and further down her throat.
Mixed expressions of awe and fear erupted from the intrigued guests.
Rory bowed down with the blade of the sword completely engulfed down her throat.
I clapped while cheering along with the crowd as she proceeded to gently pull the blade out with ease, unharmed.
"May I please get a volunteer for this next act?" She questioned the crowed, looking through a sea of eagerly raised hands.
"JEN!!" One of my maids called out to me.
"WE NEED YOU HELP IN THE KITCHEN NOW!!" They continued to yell.
I could pretend that I can't hear them over the booming crowd.
"Jen!" Rory called out my name while offering her hand, pulling me out of the crowd and to the center of the large circle of bodies.
My cheeks warmed up as I gripped onto her hand tightly, rubbing my thumb over her soft skin selfishly.
A subtle way of getting away with touching her without having questions raised.
She caught on and encompassed my hand entirely with both of hers.
"Stand here darling." She guided me to the very center of the floor.
I blushed at the very familiar pet name, swaying side to side nervously.
"Feel your ears up for me." She said.
I nodded and rubbed my earlobes before pulling at my ears.
"Nothing." I said.
"Are you sure ?" She questioned, staring into my eyes.
It was so hard to fight the urge to kiss her while holding her tightly and never let go.
"Yes."
"Then what is this?" She asked before reaching behind my ear, grazing my neck and materializing a bouquet of flowers right before my eyes.
I gasped.
Tulips.
My favorite flowers.
"Don't be shy, take them." She placed them in my hands and looked at me.
"So much has changed since I left." She whispers.
I nodded, my eyes welling up with tears as I yearned to hug her ever so tightly.
"Meet me at the local garden by the entrance of the village tonight." She mumbled loud enough for only my ears to hear.
"I can't, I have duties to attend to."
"Figure something out, you always do."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear diary,
The night was absurdly dragged out, it was nearly 2 a.m by the time guests made their way back home with intoxicated systems.
I spent most of the party beside Finneas on the throne, holding his hand uncomfortably, asking to use the bathroom every few minutes to catch a time away from the party and away from my husband.
Billie helped the maids throughout the celebration, avoiding eye contact with me until the very end.
Once all was done, we agreed to meet at my private garden and sat at the koi pond, the smell of  lavender filling our noses as the moonlight reflected off the backs of the swimming koi fish.
We were finally alone.
"How does it feel to be .... married." Billie questioned.
"Wrong." I answered honestly.
"And why's that? Is there something wrong with my brother ?" She chuckled.
"There's nothing wrong with Finneas, I love him! I believe he's fit to be a great leader, however, I don't love him in that manner." I said simply.
"Is there someone out there that you love in that way?" She stuck her hand in the water, being careful not to startle the fish.
The moons light touched her velvet skin gently, illuminating her fair shade making her look like an angel.
"Yes."
She looked up at me with wide eyes, filled with curiosity.
"Whom?" She asked.
"They know who." I smiled
"You should tell them directly then." She sat up, removing her hand from the pond.
"When? That door has long been closed."
"Now.Go run and find them and tell them how much they mean to you." She ordered.
"Why are you telling me this?" My smile grew wider.
" Because I believe you shouldn't be forced to to do something you don't want to do even if it's something as small as marrying my idiot brother." She stated sternly before standing.
"Go to them now and tell them while you have the time before it is truly too late." She turned on her heels and started making her way out of the garden.
I grabbed a hold of her wrist and made her face me before standing myself and cupping her cheeks, pulling her into a passionate kiss.
This is what I have longed for.
Her soft warm lips, pressed against mine as we kissed gently under the moonlight, nothing but natural life surrounding our secluded bodies. Far far away from others.
I felt her arms wrap around my waist, pulling me closer into her as I deepened the kiss, a series of chemical explosions being set off in my head while my heart danced with my stomach as butterflies swirled around them.
I pulled away and stared into her eyes, our noses touching ever so slightly.
"Do they know who they are?" I asked.
She nodded with the biggest grin conquering the entirety of her face.
"Do they love me too?" I questioned.
"Dearly."