Life Can Be Hard

Scars

They say to tell someone

They say it's good to talk

I know I should tell my parents

But I'm scared of their reaction

Before I started I saw it all around me

Only kids taking blades

Slicing their skin apart

Before I started I held a knife close

I put it right on my skin

All I needed was pressure

All I needed was to push it against my skin

Before I started I feared of what they'd say

What they'd think of me

I didn't want to tell anyone

I was even afraid of my best friend

They say telling someone helps

Someone that you trust

Best friends should tell each other everything

Why am I so scared?

Now I've started

I take my razor and put it on my skin

Sadness, anger, depression takes the place of my fear

I no longer fear the aftermath of my actions

It seemed to have disappeared

I wish I never started

I wish I had done like I've always done

And watched as the knife

As the blade

As the razor fell to the floor

Now I only watch as the blood drops to the floor

Now I've stopped for a while

Still scared if I'll begin again

I've been told people don't like people who do what I do

I've heard that I'll never be loved

I've heard that one day all my friends will leave me for what I do

This must not be right

But why do I feel better?

Even if it only last a second

Why do we do this?

Why do I do this?

This isn't what I wanted

I just wanted the pain to go away

But I will forever dream

Of the scars going away
-Kayla