Subzero's Oneshots

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿Tears Falling Down... (Scotland x Ireland)🇮🇪

Requested by my sister for her birthday
Inspired by Jack Stauber (Can you guess what song it is?)
Type: Random
687 words

I think this one's going to be really out of character due to how hard it is to write a oneshot with these two. I mean, really, look it up. You won't find much.
Warning: Lots and lots of the f-word. What? She told me to use lots of it. I did my best, okay?

Ireland's POV

"Hey! How's it going, Ireland?" America asked me.
"It's going very fucking good." I said happily.
"Scotland, have you seen the Loch Ness Monster yet? Also why are you wearing a skirt?"
"Good to see you, America." The Scottish country said, not wanting to reply.
"Still rainy, huh?"
"Yes."
At this point I don't even know what to say anymore.
Ame left the door open for us, and we went inside. There were many random countryhumans here, including Germany, Poland, Japan, Australia, New Zealand, Russia and some others.
"Wait, where's Britain?" I asked.
"Somewhere." The American replied.

After some time, America decided to talk to Scotland.
"Och aye the noo, Scotland." America started the conversation.
"That does not mean hello." Scotland replied.
"Did you change your fake money yet?"
"Might as well change our money's name sometime."
"Really?"
"No."
"I don't think I can buy deep-fried food with that kind of money. Can I have some, though?"
"Shut up."
"Come on, please?
"No."
"Aw. You're always no fun and angry. By the way, what's under that skirt?"
Some of the people in the party laughed a little. This is bound to go very wrong in one fucking second.
Scotland slammed his hand on the table. "You think that's funny?" He asked.
Oh, now they've made him fucking mad.
"That wasn't fucking funny!" He pointed to America. "Why did you have to do this?"
"Because I can." He replied.
"That's not a fucking answer!"
"Scotland, maybe you should, uhm, calm down?"
I'd usually join in the fight, but this doesn't seem like a good idea.
"Why should I?" He yelled. "This imbecile doesn't know what's funny and what hurts other people! He should be taught the difference."
"Hey, I know the difference!" America said. "You're saying it wrong. And you shouldn't even be caring about all this!"
"I should if you're making fun of me! I'd do anything for you to fucking stop, even if it means ripping your throat and tearing you to shreds!"
Tears came out of my friend's eyes.
"Try me. You can only say threats. I can fight."
"Scotland-"
"Stay out of this, lad! I'll handle this!"
At this point, I was done.
"SCOTLAND, YOU'RE THE FUCKING IMBECILE IF YOU WANT TO HURT ANYONE FOR A STUPID FUCKING REASON!"
"IRELAND, YOU'RE NOT IN THIS!"
"YES I AM! WHY CAN'T YOU JUST FUCKING ACCEPT THAT I'M HERE TO-"
The door opened. The person who came in was Britain.
"What's going on here?"
Britain looked around. Australia and New Zealand were nowhere to be seen.
"United States Of America. Care explaining?"
"...Did you hear us fighting?" He asked.
"What were you fighting about?"
"Nothing. I was just uh, saying good things about Scotland, right Scotland?"
"You're a fucking imbecile if you think he'll believe that." Scotland replied.
Britain sighed. "Were you saying those random things to him again?"
"But seriously, can we all agree that the Loch Ness Monster isn't real?"
"I HAVE SEEN NESSIE WITH MY TWO BARE EYES."
"You're done hosting parties for the next 2 months." 
"But dad-"
"No. Everyone, this party is over. Germany, you're staying for a little longer."

I was driving the car to our house, with Scotland in the seat beside me.
"Hey, I'm very fucking sorry that I let that get out of hand. I didn't mean to yell at you back there."
"No, I'm sorry. I should have stopped."
"It's not your fault. You could have politely asked him to fucking stop."
"You know he's just going to keep on going about the weather, and Nessie, and-"
"Hey, if you feel uncomfortable, you can always tell me, hell, even argue to me. You're very fun to talk to."
"I am?"
"You are! It's fun to see whatever the fuck you're doing next. It's cool! You're very different from everyone else. Your animal is a unicorn, and I think that's actually fitting for you."
"...Thank you Ireland. You're pretty cool, too."
"You're welcome."

(This is the worst oneshot I have ever made so far.)