Don't Deserve You | Drarry Fanfic ✓

Chapter 7: Hurt

Life is too short to spend it at a war by yourself.
-unknown

Draco's POV

I had agreed to Pot- Harry's request to hang out. It's not like I can actually say no. He wouldn't leave me alone until I said yes but of course, on the inside I didn't want him to leave. Stupid Draco, Stupid stupid Draco. You're falling for him yet again.

I've had the biggest crush on Harry ever since third year or so but I blew every chance by being the git I was. Then eighth year came along and I promised myself to distance myself from Harry 'cuz i know that no matter what.... in the end, it's impossible for us in so many aspects.

We're both guys, the world wouldn't be supporting and I'm a Malfoy, I'm only allowed to marry a pureblood. If I don't, I'm sure my father would escape Azkaban just to skin me alive. My mother would support me. She's the only one who knows I'm gay but even she can't do anything but then again why am I even thinking about all this? Harry's not gay and he will never like me.

Sure, he has tried to talk and be my friend this year but that's all. Maybe, he just wants to call it a truce but I know if I do, We'll just get closer, making it harder for my heart to let him go. That's why in this one week I've been trying my best to avoid Harry but at the same time try to get him onto normal eating habits. I'm proud that I was half of the reason why Harry started eating again....

"Malfoy!" I heard Harry's familiar voice from behind and I stopped on my tracks, so that he could catch up with me before walking in confident strides along with the boy that I can't have.

"Let's go grab our brooms from our dorm , then we can head to the quidditch grounds." Harry said and I rolled my eyes at how dumb he can be sometimes.

I took out my wand and used accio to summon my broom, diving Harry a pointed look as he shyly stared at his feet with a sheepish grin. He looked extremely cute but I would never let him know that.

"Right..." he said quietly before summoning his firebolt. A broom that I've always wanted.

We made our way to the quidditch field and I positioned myself on my nimbus before flying off the ground with a push. I steadied myself in the air as the wind blew my hair in all directions, I knew I should have used more gel.

Harry followed and flew in front of me with such a carefree spark in his eyes as he breath in and out as if he just got freedom after a year in Azkaban.

"Merlin, I missed this feeling." He muttered but loud enough for me to hear. I let out a light chuckle as I nodded. I missed it too.

"Want to play race?" He asked and I nodded with a confident pose.

"Ok, first one to make two circles and touch that tree over there and make their way all the way back here wins." He said and I smirked at this. Two circles huh?

I flew to Harry, so that I was perfectly beside him. He counted to three and with that he flew to make two big laps around the field and I shook my head as I made two tiny circles on where I stood , then flew all the way to the tree and all the way back. I could hear yelling at me and calling me a cheater all the way and I laughed hard as I saw Harry's grumpy face making its way over to me.

"What the hell was that?!" He asked as he neared me and gave me a light punch on the shoulder, which I returned.

"You said two circles." I said in a bored tone but was gushing with excitement on the inside. He frowned before he understood and glared at me.

"I meant two big circles around the field!" He said as he made a circle motion with his fingers and I just shrugged.

"Should've been more specific." I said as I zoomed past him. He followed behind and chased me. The sound of our laughter and the wind filling my ears as I slowed and made my way to the ground. I landed with a light thump as I dropped my broom and ran around the field with my arms up in the air. I knew real well that I looked like a fool right now.

Harry started chasing me on the ground instead and soon caught up, catching my waist from behind and pulling me into a back hug. My breath hitched as I felt Harry's chest against my upper back. He leaned and placed his head on my shoulder which only caused my heart to pound in my chest.

"Got you now." He whispered in my ear and it sounded so damn sexual in that deep voice of his. I tried to wiggle out of his hold but he just gripped my waist tighter.

"Harry, let go." I said in an almost whisper because on the inside I never want him to let me go. I want to feel his arms wrapped around me this securely on my waist which only made my heart hurt more as a tear dripped down my cheek.

"Nooo." He said in a teasing tone and I used all the strength I had inside me and pushed him off. I turned to see his surprised frown but I ignored it and picked up my broom, planing on leaving but Harry got a hold of my wrist before I could.

"Draco, why are you crying?" He asked in such a soft voice that almost made me give in but I stopped myself. I can't have Harry, I can't have him no matter how much I'd love to. I need to distance myself from him, was all that ran through my mind.

"Let go and it's Malfoy, not Draco." I said in a harsh tone that caused Harry to let go in surprise. I looked up and saw his hurt expression and my body screamed to hug him and tell him everything is okay but that little bit of rationality told me to leave and that's exactly what I did. I left Harry over there on the field, hurt and it was because of me.

Good job Draco, you don't deserve Harry. Not one bit.

I ran and ran, not knowing where my feet would take me and ran. Hoping all my problems would dissolve. I rushed past many students that got me a lot of wierd stares but I didn't care.

I soon realised I was at my dorm and I locked the door as I slid down against the wall, crying in my own pity.

Bloody hell Draco, why do you have to be such a horrible person. You just hurt someone who wanted nothing but to actually talk to you. You hurt the only person that you genuinely love. That's all you know how to do, mess up.

I scratched my head in frustration as I let out a huge sob that was followed by more sobs. I cried and cried after a long time of bottling it all up. I don't want to live life like this.

What did I do to deserve this? Oh wait, who am I kidding? I did everything to deserve this. This is exactly what I deserve. Pain, pain is all I deserve. I don't deserve Harry, I don't deserve to see him smile, I don't deserve to even want him 'cuz i'm a horrible person and I always will be.

I promise not to hurt Harry, ever again. I'll just leave his world alone, so he can get the happy ever after he always wanted.

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