The Journey From One To Another

Exhausted

It hurts when people underestimate what I do. Often going to bed exhausted from the things I do during the day, and then during the night, no matter how exhausted I am, I shall never find sleep. When someone I care about is sick, I care for them. Taking care of their needs, holding their head above the toilet as they puke. No matter how sick I am, I always try my best to care for the ones I love most. Then my chest begins to ache; a deep pain that will always be there. For i know, that no matter how much love i might show most people, i will never see the same from their receiving end. I lay restless with worry, so instead i go and sit by them. Wiping their forehead with a cold cloth, bringing them soup. Checking their temperature during the long hours of the night. You may sing your song to the mocking bird, but they may sing back nothing at all. You extend yourself past your limits, only begging to be hurt again. It may only happen so many times before you learn, that in the end you will get hurt and there is no way around it. The people you care for most will eventually leave, it is just what happens. Exhausted, you fall into bed day by day and night by night. Sleeping, but never dreaming. Awake, but never feeling. Emotional, but numb. You begin to adapt around it all. Becoming so shut down that you could not even talk to yourself about your own problems. Remembering as if you have none, as if the heavy load placed upon your shoulders is as light as feathers. But in the end it will always catch up with you, leaving you to feel just as broken as the nights you stare at your ceiling silently, no thoughts, no dreams, just silence. For now but not forever..