The devil all the time// a short Matthew Gray gubler fanfic

11

I let out a scream as I shot up on the bed I started panting trying to catch my breath, I gripped the covers on my bed as tears fell down my face, a few seconds later matthew came barging into the room "what's wrong?" He asked worriedly walking over to me, I didn't answer I just kept panting "darling what happened" he asked cupping my face and sitting on the bed in front of me "he's back, he's back, he got out" I sobbed "please don't let him hurt me again" I cried more "he's not going to hurt you darling, I promise, who is he?" Matthew asked I looked at him and my breathing calmed down "I can't say" I whispered swallowing the lump in my throat, Matthew looked confused but nodded slightly "okay" he pulled me into a hug lightly, I sneaked my arms around his thin torso burying my face in his chest sniffling as I did so, he wrapped one arm around my waist and the other was on my cheek playing with my hair softly as he kissed the top of my head trying his best to comfort me "you know I would never let anyone hurt you right? I would shoot them right between the eyes if anyone laid a finger on you" he said cupping my cheeks so I was now looking at him again, I let a few new tears fall at his words as I took in this moment, us this close and cuddled up was something I've been longing for and it felt amazing, the more I looked at this man the more I fell deeply in love with him.
He pulled me close to his face and kissed my lips softly "will you ever hurt me again?" I whispered with a shaky voice "no, I promise I'll never hurt you again" he whispered planting a soft kiss on my forehead, I looked at his face taking in his dark eyes plump lips and soft skin, I raised my hand up and put it on his cheek running my thumb over his cheekbone "your
So handsome" I said softly with a smile as I tilted my head "thank you" he smiled I gave him one back and hugged him again "I think you should lay down and have a nap or just chill out for a bit, I can only imagine your hangover is dreadful" he said standing up and looking at me "yeah it is, I think I might just sit and chill then I'll make dinner" I nodded "no need for that, we're going out again tonight so you won't be needing to make dinner" he said walking to the door "are you serious?" I said letting out a sigh "yup that's why I told you to chill out for a bit, and I don't want to see You touching any alcohol" he said walking through the door to leave, I groaned and fell back on the bed, i can't go out again are you kidding me, it's fine I'll just leave early or something "I'll make you coffee and something to eat and I'll bring it up" he said I nodded and muttered an okay before he walked out and shut the door behind him. I was bored so I decided to try and write another song, I didn't know what to write about then it hit me, I started writing about last night, how I felt when he was talking to the girl at the bar and how he would rather want to kiss her and want to be with her because she's prettier, she's a heather.
A few minutes later I heard a knock at the door "come in" I said as I was half way through the song, I didn't know what else to write but I'm sure it will come to me soon, I put down my book and looked to the door to see Matthew walk in with a cup of coffee in his hand and a plate "I made you french toast I hope you like it" he said putting the plate down in front of me "ohhh I love french toast, thank you so much" I smiled up at him as he sent one back then I started to dig into my food which tasted like heaven "what's this?" He asked referring to the book I had in front of me and before I could reach up and grab it from him he had already picked it up and looked at it reading the name "who's heather?" he asked looking slightly confused, I sighed and rolled my eyes a bit feeling slightly embarrassed "um, I made it up but she's a girl who's perfect in every way possible, she's a heather" I shrugged with a small nod, I cleared my throat and started to eat again "why did you write the song? Who's it about?" He asked I could feel his eyes burning a hole in the top of my head "I-I don't know, I just came up with it" I Stuttered with a shrug I looked at him and he nodded "make sure to sing it to me when it's finished" he smirked while turning around and walking away closing the door behind him, once the door was closed and I knew he was away I let out a loud groan and flopped back on my bed,
I'm so embarrassed he totally knew what the song was about "ugh Darlene you fucking idiot" I sighed putting my hands on my head.
It was a few hours later and we were going out now, I had light makeup on my hair is wavy and I was wearing a black lace body suit with a white shirt with a black and gold belt with some gold rings and necklaces and on my feet I just had some strapy heels, Matthew was wearing a black sweater with a white shirt under it with some black skinny jeans and a par of round ish glasses he looked really good.
We walked into the club to see everyone there "hey babygirl, how you doing?" Shemar asked pulling me into a hug "I'm doing really good mar, thank you" I said giving him a big grin that showed by my teeth making him laugh "has it something to do with a blonde white skinny dude who thinks he knows everything?" Mar asked leaning into my ear speaking over the loud music "maybe" I smiled shrugging my shoulders mar smiled and folded his arms over his chest, ever since yesterday I've been feeling good about me and Matthew I know the whole situation about the girl wasn't amazing but what he's been saying to me and everything has made me feel happy and every time I look at him I can't help but smile. Shemar noticed I was looking at him with a smile as Matthew talked to Lenore "he really makes you happy huh?" Mar asked from beside me I looked up at him with a smile "yeah, he really does" I nodded looking back to Matthew "even after everything he's done?" He asked looking at my side profile, I gave mar a sad smile and a nod feeling guilty for loving Matthew after everything he's done to me, it was quite for a while until Shemar spoke again "your in love with him aren't you?" He asked "how'd you know?" I asked looking up at him "the way you look at him" he said I squinted my eyes and turned to face mar crossing my arms "oh yeah? And how do I look at him?" I asked tilting my head up at the tall figure who happened to turn out to be one of my closest friends "you look at him like he's the only guy in the world, if he were to die you would to, weather that would be from heartbreak or trying to save him from a burning fire, you always have looked at him like that, I noticed it from day one, I think everyone did" mar shrugged with his huge biceps in front of my face, I stood there shocked at what he had just said, did I really look at him like that? Before I could answer him back I heard my name being called, I looked over to see Maya and Eleanor waving me over as they sat next to Matthew as he sipped on his drink looking at me with a small smile "I gotta go" I chuckled pointing at them "no problem babe" mar smiled I walked over to the table to where everyone was sitting I waved at Mitch Louis liam and Damon then got yanked down next to the girls with Matthew at my left side, I would tell may and Lenore were pretty drunk already "hey guys, I can see you've already started without me" I said jokingly with a chuckle, I felt something on my thigh so I looked down and saw Matthew's hand, I smirked and put my hand on his moving his hand up further and more to the inside of my thigh, I peaked a look up at him and he was smiling I would almost say he was blushing "here" Lenore said catching me off guard handing me a cocktail, I took it out of her hands and was going to take a drink but a hand stoped me "uh uh, I don't think so" Matthew said putting it down on the table In front of him "oh come on dad, it's only one" I said looking at him, he looked at me and rolled his eyes handing the cocktail back to me "thank you" I smiled giving him a kiss on the cheek.
It was about an hour later and me and the girls were talking until I heard an all to familiar voice that boiled my blood, Matthew's hand automatically left my thigh which made me look up, he stood up in front of the girl I've not seen since high school, well let me say that again, stood in front of him was the same girl he was at the bar with the other night, my eyes stayed in her as he introduced her to everyone, everyone I've grown so fond of, she was wearing all white, white flared trousers with a white shirt sleeved top she had white shirt straight hair as well you could see from a mile away she's had her lips done as well, but just like in high school she was still the prettiest one in the room, I was in so much of a daze I didn't realise Matthew had gotten to me "and this is Darlene evans, my assistant" he spoke making my heart shatter into a million peace's, normally I would of just got angry and walked out but this time I didn't even bother I jus sucked it up and stood up, everyone's eyes where on me and mines never left hers "Darlene this is-" he was about to say but I cut him off "grace, grace Peterson" I said still in shock "you two know each other?" Matthew asked I heard Maya and Eleanor gasp from behind me, I felt like crying and I could feel the tears brining in my eyes I was trying so hard to keep them down "you could say that" grace smirked looking at Matthew "we used to go to school together" I said looking at him giving him a slight glare "you've changed so much" she gave me a fake smile "since I was 14, no shit" I said making her chuckle at me Matthew gave me a glare and at the corner of my eye I could see Shemar laughing, I cleared my throat and turned around sitting in between may and Lenore and grace sat next to Matthew, i wanted to cry seeing them two together, she always got the guys in school and even stole guys that were already taken, yup that's right she stool my boyfriend, she none-stop bullied me all the way through high school, she'd bully me about how fat I was even though I was a size8 she bullied me about how ugly I was as well and mostly she bullied me because of my father, he's a story for another time though.
I looked at mar and he gave me a sympathetic smile "you good?" He mouthed I shook my head and he made a heart with his hands which made me smile, I could tell that everyone at the table felt uncomfortable and knew I didn't want to be here, Eleanor rested her head in my shoulder Mitch took my hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze I looked up at him and gave the best smile I could, I couldn't sit like this the whole night, I had to do something.
It was another hour latter and I was a bit tipsy, I heard a snag come on that I absolutely love "I love this song!!" I yelled standing up downing my drink and walking past everyone so I was in front of them "I said certified freak, seven days a week wet ass pussy, make that pull out game weak!" I sang the lyrics as I danced I looked at Maya and pointed at her for her to get up and dance I knew she would because she's way drunker than I am and I know Lenore doesn't like to dance that much. As Me and may danced to WAP I turned around and walked to mar dancing in front of him and grinding on him like I was doing to Maya before, then I grabbed his face and slowly went closer to him soon making my lips kiss his softly I pulled away with a smirk as he had one on his face to and went back to grinding and dancing with Maya, everyone at the table was laughing or shocked apart from Matthew who looked angry and grace who looked absolutely disgusted which only made the smile on my face grow bigger.
Shemar said he was going out to have a cigarette so I thought I'd go with him, I had to apologies for kissing him because it wasn't right. We walked outside of the club because we aren't actually allowed outside especially me and he lit the cigarette "mar, I just wanted to say sorry for kissing you, I don't know what I was thinking and I know it was so stupid of me-" I rambled on but he stopped me with a shake of his head "it's okay Darlene, you don't need to be sorry" he said shaking his head looking at me "if I were you I would've done the exact same thing" he said "but he's your best friend mar, he's going to be so angry at you I won't be surprised if he comes out and shoots you in the face" I said pointing at him he let out a chuckle at what I said "I know I'm his best friend but I don't care, what he's just done to you and what he's been doing to you isn't fair, and if he does shoot me then so be it, at least you got your revenge by kissing me" he said making me laugh, he wrapped his arm around the back of my neck and pulled me to his chest, he had the cigarette in his other hand, I rested my hand on his stomach because he was way taller than me and he was slightly taller than Matthew as well, we heard the doors open revealing everyone except from Damon, he probably got with some chick at the bar or something, Matthew came out laughing but when he looked at us his smile failed and he glared at Shemar, I groaned and pushed myself lazily off him making my way to the others who were near the stairs, grace and Matthew were sitting on the steps as everyone was standing up, everyone was talking and I was just listening in until I heard Matthew speak "here take this" he said pulling off his sweater and handing it to grace leaving him in only a white t shirt, everyone had noticed and stopped talking, my heart hurt, I was so angry and upset, from all the months we've been living together, from the first time he fingered me on the couch to the time he asked me to make love to him he has never asked me if I wanted his sweater, he's gave me shirts before but that was after that one time we had sex, it's not the same.
I let out a sigh and crossed my arms over my chest as I walked past everyone and walked upstairs not saying a word to anyone.
I got into the apartment and took my shoes off at the door then went upstairs to my room shutting and locking the door behind me, I didn't bother to change my clothes I just went right to bed, I pulled the covers over me and sighed as tears started to fall which soon turned into sobs, here I am back at square one again.

Sorry I've not been updating a lot I recently lost my best friend a few weeks ago and I've just been trying to deal with that, I'll update as soon as I can the book is nearly finished it's only got like three parts left or something so I'll try and have them up soon:)