Wha-if rockstars went to boarding school

Chapter 21: OKAY THE DO NOT DISTURB SIGN IS FOR A REASON.

Tommy Lee

I caress his hair as our lips connect, my purple ones against his red ones. I gently pull him on top of me, trying not to injure his ribs any further than they are.

"N-Nikkiii." I moan as he slides his hands along my body. I've been slowly working with him, but this is the first time we'll be doing this since...since he got raped.

The word itself chills my soul. Such a terrible thing.

"Mmmm." He groans into the kiss, as I slide my hand to his crotch, feeling him getting harder and harder against me. "Mmmmh god." He breathes. "Tommy. Ooh- ahh- god." Nikki breathes as I begin palming him. He was tense when we started, almost looking scared.

I had made sure he was okay with this, and now he's definitely enjoying this. I grope his body gently, making sure not to hurt him as I stick my large hand inside his pants. The second I feel the connection between his cock and my palm, I feel overwhelming arousal.

Then the door creaks open and we instantly jump away from each other. I pull my hand out of his pants and we try to disconnect as fast as we fucking can. I put a pillow in my lap, trying to hide the raging boner I have.

Nikki flips onto his stomach but I can see the pain on his face. I would imagine, he just crushed his ribs with his whole damn body.

Ozzy just stares at us and I know we've been caught. "Ozzy." I start. I look over at Nikki, whose face is so red that he's practically glowing.

"Whoa." Is all Ozzy says, stepping out of the doorway and closing the door behind him. I look over at Nikki, but he's not there. I hear the slamming of the bathroom door.

I roll over on his bed, still fucking hard. Damn it. Damn it Lee. You rushed him. Fuck. I sigh and turn over, when something pricks lightly on my leg. Curious, I flip the covers back, but what I found, it terrifies me.

Nikki Sixx.

Fuck that wasn't what I needed.

Well, I'm back here, in this bathroom, flicking my lighter on as the spoon in my hand holds the key to what saves me from madness, yet drives me to it.

I don't really know why I'm doing this. Why I just darted away from Tommy. But I did. Call it fight or flight. Or call it being a pussy, but I could feel the heroin wearing off, and I needed to be fucked up to not have a slight internal breakdown.

I don't think anybody else would understand about this. I'm ashamed of myself, I got raped. It's not my fault, they say.

Some rational part of me believes that too, then there's  the little guy in my head that I not-so-affectionately named Sikki.

He tells me lies. Sells my fucking soul and sanity down the river of darkness. So why do I believe him? I'm not sure, maybe it's because I have nobody else to believe.

For instance I've found that the ones who convince you to peel back the layers of yourself, who say that you can always talk to them, or reach out when you're drowning, are fucking liars.

Yeah sure they'll talk the talk, but the second you go under the water, feeling the oxygen draining from your lungs, and reach out a hand for help, they'll be the ones to kick you right back under the water.

Solidifying your fate.

Ohhh Sixx, you know that nobody would rescue you, you worthless piece of shit.

Fuck.

Face it, you don't have that kind of value.

More lies, courtesy of Sikki.

They're not lies, quit trying to soften the blow.

I ready the needle, hands slightly shaking as I search for a vein.

Nobody would fucking care if you overdosed and died right here, on this floor. Life would go on, Tommy wouldn't have to pretend to care about you anymore, your mom could rest easy in her hell hole, your adoptive family shipped you here anyways. To get rid of you.

I find the needle, poising it, ready to make some sense of humanity return to myself. Call it self medication to make yourself feel better. Put a fucking band aid over the stab wound.
As you bleed out, it helps for a little

A/N: heyyyaaaa! Doing much better recently but missing a good friend. Fuck my life. Also I managed to cry 6 times over EVH today. It STILL hurts