𝗜𝗺𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀..... | 𝗷𝗶𝗸𝗼𝗼𝗸 |

i

jimin pov
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School. Another awful day of school waits for me beyond this bus door. I genuinely wonder why I can't enjoy anything in life. I wonder why I can't ever be as happy as everyone else. Why I can't smile without faking it? Why I can't laugh?

But in the end I always come out with the same conclusion.

Nothing.

There is nothing stopping me from going out and talking to someone or being happy but myself. And because of myself and the way I think, I will never be happy.

I sigh deeply before taking careful steps off the bus and onto school grounds. Once both feet are securely on the ground my gaze shifts straight to my shoes.

Looking at how each loop had a white shoe lace coming out of it. Following the white path to the bow with my eyes.

As I advance to the school door I thoroughly count each step. It takes 23 to get to the school doors. Twenty three steps to hell. Just the thought of having to be here everyday for the next two years of my life makes me want to die.

But to be completely honest, most things do.

"Hey you again!" I hear someone yell quite loudly.

Obnoxious people and their obnoxious gatherings.

There are people all around me talking and laughing as they got their books out of their lockers. Walking and texting while pretending to listen to their friends, and then you have me.

The outlier.

The small black haired boy with no friends. The same boy that is always alone.

"Hey!" I hear this voice call again and for some reason it's getting closer to me. It is all too familiar but I know that no one would be talking to me so why would I look up? Why would I risk the embarrassment of it not being me?

"Jimin!" I freeze. He is calling my name. I look up slightly and accept my fate. It's the boy from yesterday. This is it. I've been beaten and bruised by plenty of people. He is no different.

He approaches me fast with a giant smile. I keep my eyes focused on the ground with my hands clasped tightly awaiting my punishment. My punishment for being weird. My punishment for being who I am.

"Hey Jimin! How are you today? You looked a little sad yesterday I wanted to make sure you're okay." He admits and I feel the tears quickly run down my face.

Why didn't he just hit me?

He could have hit me and that would have hurt less than this. I don't need him to pretend to care about me. That's the cruelest thing you could do. His smile is bright and he is practically radiating positive energy. It's so different from what I'm used to. Stop it.

"Do you um- talk?" He asks with a questioning look on his face and if he didn't think I was weird before. He has to now.

I do talk. I haven't heard my own voice in a day but it's there. I nod my head still not trusting him enough to look up at him.

"Well as you know I'm Taehyung. We met yesterday remember?" He says hopefully and I nod again. I'm not interested in talking to him, in being his friend. He's only going to leave and disappoint me like everyone always does.

"I'm sorry if I did anything to make you not want to talk to me." He apologizes and I can't describe the feeling that's brewing inside of me. My eyes found the top of his head when I glance up to see his expression. He is looking at the ground as well. Why is he talking to me? Of all people. I hesitantly reach my hand out and extra gently tap his shoulder. His head shot up with a intrigued expression.

"Yeah?" He scratches the back of his neck awkwardly and for once I see him become nervous. For once I see something that we could possibly have in common. I point to the phone in his pocket and he frantically opens and gives it to me. I put my phone number and name in his phone.

He seems... okay. He seems like a person I could potentially enjoy the presence of.

"Who's this?" Another boy comes from behind me and puts his arm around my shoulder. My breathing has never sped up so fast in my entire sixteen years of living.

Who has their arm around me? Who is touching me?Who is burning my skin? The sensation of the unidentified limb around me makes me want to scream.

Don't touch me. Please don't touch me.

He removes his arm after Taehyung gives him a disgusted and annoyed look.

"Hey man my bad I just wanted to talk to Tae." The boy tries talking to me but I can't take this anymore. I have to get away. I give Taehyung his phone back an walk right past the entire situation. That's enough for me for one day. I hear the fast approaching footsteps behind me and how I wish they weren't there.

"Don't leave." Taehyungs concerned voice echos through my head as his hand attaches to my arm.

Why is he touching me? Why is everyone touching me?

My body starts to self destruct all over again. I try pulling my arm away but his grip is a little strong. I know he he didn't mean it. I know he wasn't trying to hurt me but he did. I'm suffocating.

"Let go!" I scream before ripping my arm away and running out of the building. It's not like I have parents that will care if I don't go to school. It's not like anyone at school would miss me.

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Trying my best✨