All Because of You

Chapter 6

I sit at a large dining room table next to Andrew and some strangers I don't know. There are only three other kids here who are still young enough to watch SpongeBob. After everyone is finished eating Andrew's mom starts washing the dishes.

"Why don't you show Olivia around?" Andrew's mom suggests.

"Okay," Andrew replies.

We walk upstairs and he points out rooms to me. Bedrooms, bathrooms, and sitting rooms. It's very boring other than being able to talk to Andrew. We sit down in one of the sitting rooms and I decide to ask him a question. "Are you and Courtney still dating?" I blurt out.

"Yeah why?" Andrew stares at me with his big blue eyes.

"I was just wondering," I say while staring down at my feet. I start to blush and Andrew lifts my chin up so I'm looking at him. I know what's coming next. Our lips touch and I don't pull away. But then I realize something. "You have a girlfriend."

"Olivia, I really like you. I would love to date you but I already have some chick as my girlfriend," Andrew rolls his eyes.

"Is she like forcing you to date her? You don't seem very happy about it," I laugh.

"Of course she's not forcing me but I'm not happy at all about dating her," Andrew admits.

"Then why are you dating her?" I ask confused.

"To be popular of course," he replies.

I stare at him in disbelief. He wants to be popular? He would rather be popular than date a girl he actually likes! I stand up and right before I leave the room Andrew grabs my wrist.

"I didn't mean it like that. I wouldn't rather be popular than date you," Andrew says.

"Get off of me," I say shaking his grasp off of my wrist. I walk out of the room and down stairs. "Mom, I feel sick. May I please go home?"

"Of course," My mom smiles at me.

I leave after thanking everyone and then text Cassie that I need her. I feel like I am going to throw up. Cassie lives down the street from me so two seconds later she is knocking on my front door. I open up the door. "I thought you were having dinner with your dead aunt."

"Olivia, I'll explain later. Right now it looks like you're having an anxiety attack," Cassie says while walking into my house.

"That's because I am," I say. We walk upstairs into my room and I lock my door.

"What happened?" Cassie asks me with concern in her eyes.

"I kissed him," I say sitting on the bed. I put my head in my hands and start to cry.

"If you kissed him then why are you crying? I thought you liked that douche bag," Cassie replies.

"Afterwards he said he would rather be popular than date me. That's why he's dating Courtney," I cry.

"At first I thought he changed. I guess I was wrong," Cassie says putting her arm around my shoulder.

"Cassie, what are you talking about?" I ask looking up at my best friend.

"Nothing," Cassie smiles.

"No. You're always looking at Andrew weirdly, saying mean things about him, and ignoring him. What is going on?" I ask.

"Just trust me when I say stay away from Andrew," Cassie says.

"Or what will happen?" I ask not taking my eyes off of her.

"You'll regret it," She replies.

I am so confused right now that I don't even reply. Something is up between Cassie and Andrew. Cassie leaves and I fall asleep. I wake up somewhere around 8 'o clock and I go down stairs. I make myself some coffee and sit down at the kitchen table. I look outside I see that the leaves are changing color. I stuff my hair into a messy bun and run upstairs when I finish my coffee. I get changed and throw on a gray t-shirt and jeans. I lay down in the grass outside and watch some squirrels climb up and down a tree. The fat squirrel is holding an acorn and the skinnier one is chasing after him. Andrew sits down next to me and I look away from him.

"Can't we talk?" Andrew asks me.

"I don't care," I lie. I'm still in love with him but I don't want Andrew to think I'm weak.

"I really didn't mean what I said last night," Andrew replies.

"I just can't believe you would rather be popular than date me," I say. "I'm sorry that sounded really selfish."

"I can't believe you're really that desperate. You just want a boyfriend. You don't want me to be more popular than you. You don't want me to be better than you," Andrew spits out.

"You don't really mean that," I say.

"Yes I do," Andrew says harshly.

He stands up and walks away. I don't stop him from leaving and I will regret it later. I hit the ground with my fists and start crying. Long painful sobs. Each one filled with pain and anger. Each one filled with loss. It feels like I just had a break up even though we were never dating. I spend the next three hours sobbing outside. Several times, I would stand up and walk into the woods. Each time getting closer and closer to the bridge. When I was suicidal I tried jumping off that bridge. Before I jumped I saw a bird fly down from her nest to the ground. Lying on the ground was a dead bird. Her baby. I couldn't jump off that bridge for my parents' sake. But now, I am only thinking of myself. I walk back out of the woods and my mom calls my name.

"What is it?" I reply.

"Come eat lunch!" My mom replies.

"I'm not hungry," I reply. My mom doesn't argue with me and she closes the door. I sit back down against a tree and cry. But nothing comes.