groupie - michael clifford u.s.

• thirty - two •

3 days.

The same thing has been running through my head since late last night.

And I don't know if I'm going crazy or not, but Michael told me he loved me last night.

is it bad that I feel the same way?

He's been so close to me all day today and I'm not complaining but i need to talk to him about it. ask if what he said was true or if he was just extremely tired and saying things. maybe it was just a thought that slipped out of his mouth. I'm not sure. but I needed to talk to him about it.

"Do you have you ever just say something that you don't mean to say when you think no one is listening?" I asked Michael who was currently turning out of the Mexican restaurant we had just eaten at. he looked at me and wrinkled his eyebrows and snickering to himself.

"No I don't usually do that. if I say something I usually mean it." he turning onto the exit to get off of the highway.

"So like, if like you said like for example that you loved me or something, then you would mean it?" I licked my lips.

Michael looked at me questionably before continuing to drive.

"uhm. Why do you use that example?" he asked, stopping at a red light.

"Oh. I don't know." I fumbled with my fingers. The car was silent for what felt like forever.

"I heard you say something last night." My voice was low, I didn't know how to really talk about this. He looked at me worriedly.

"What, what did you hear me say?" He licked his lips and I saw him gulp a bit. He gripped the steering wheel a little tighter. he looked really nervous.

"Oh. Uhm I don't know." I looked out of the window, "that you love me." I looked down at my lap. He pulled into the drive way of the house and parked. We sat in silence for awhile. I didn't look up at him for that time. I looked up and he was leaning his head against the steering wheel. I hesitantly ran my fingers across his arm. He moved his head to face me. He laced our fingers together and kissed my knuckles. He moved over the console and kissed me sweetly. It was a long kiss, which I wasn't complaining on.

"I did." he moved his lips off of me. And looked into my eyes making my heart felt. "You give me that feeling I get when I see the pizza guy pull up into my drive way or the feeling I get when I win a really hard level on a video game that I've been trying on for weeks. The rush I get when I'm making love to you is more then the feeling I get when I'm on stage in front of thousands. You know it's only been a month of dating, it may be really early, but I feel it. I feel it so much. I can't stand to be away from you for more than an hour. I don't know how I'm going to get through this on tour, but I guess it'll be okay. Because I know that the love of my life is waiting at home for me. I don't even care if you don't feel the same, it won't change how I feel about you. You make me fanboy Gwen. My mind does flips every single time I imagine you just... god I can't even tell you in words how I feel about you. I love the way your hair constantly falls in your face and you get aggravated just because you hate putting your hair up but you don't want it in your way. I love how much you can change my anger or sadness to happiness or lust. I used to always want sex and only that, because I had only felt love once and that was before the band got big and it hurt when we separated. like really bad. but I feel like taking that risk with you. I love so many things about you. The way you get so emotional with certain movies like your favorite one, if I stay. Or how much you love playing video games with me. I love the way you can get lost so easily. You're so damn adorable and sometimes when I look at you I just want to grab your face and kiss it a thousand times because you're so lovable. You make me smile so hard sometimes. I remember when I first saw you at that club when we first met and I knew there was just something about you. I don't know what it was, but you just intrigued me. You also look extremely hot and I thought you were just another groupie but obviously not. I don't know Gwen. I feel things for you I didn't know I could feel. I remember just the other day when we had sex for the first time I almost cried because of the love I felt. I sound like a girl saying this stuff..." he brushed his hands over his face, "but do you get what I'm saying? I just want you to be mine for a very long time. I want you to be the girl I sleep next to. The girl I wake up to. The girl that I can call my wife in the future. And that means something because I always told myself I would never get married. But seriously gwen, you're my entire world. I love you so damn much. I don't know how to show you or tell you just how much. I'm going crazy on the inside because I just can't believe that I can call you my own. You're so damn beautiful, I love you so much. So so much."

I felt tears prick my eyes. I wiped them away quickly before breathing in deeply. I grabbed his face and kissed him, not wanting to ever let go. He grabbed the back of my neck, pulling me closer to him. I crawled over the middle console and straddled his lap. I ran my fingers through his hair while his hands ran down body.

I pressed down on him making him release a groan.

"Michael." I said out of breath, letting him kiss down my neck and down the valley of my low cut shirt.

"Hmm?" he hummed, still kissing the skin. I grabbed his face and turned it towards me, "I love you too." my mouth curved into a smile. Michael smiled back and kissed me again. He kept pecking my lips. He kissed every single part of my face, making me giggle.

"This is a moment to capture." He chuckled, grabbing the Polaroid camera that he brings absolutely everywhere with us. I leaned my temple on his while he took the picture, creating a flash and a clicking sound. the picture fell, coming to view slowly. He blew on it before smiling at it.

"I'm taking this one on tour." he nodded to himself. I grabbed be camera and took another picture of us. This time Michael head was smuggled into the crook of my neck. I was smiling warmly at the camera. I grabbed the picture that fell from the camera and blew on it, watching as it to came into view.

"I'm keeping this one." I smiled, kissing his forehead. We put the pictures down along with the camera and I continued to sit on top of him.

"I don't want to leave you." Michael broke the silence that filled the car. I frowned before looking into his eyes, "you'll always be here with me. In my heart." I patted my chest, "because I'm pretty sure you're all of it." I smiled at him. He kissed me swiftly before breaking away and wrapping his arms tighter around me.

Then he asked the question I had been dreading him to ask me

"When am I going to meet your parents?"

Oh no.