Snow It Up [Shake It Up]

chapter four

A few days had gone by since CeCe hung out with Deuce and Dina, and they were long and tiring at Crusty's because people were wanting more and more pizza as Christmas came up for some reason. Deuce tried to give CeCe some more of her gifts that him and Dina got her, but she didn't accept any of them until Christmas day came around. They finally complied with her wishes, which was surprising. She thought that they would continue to bug her about it until she said yes, but they didn't. She spoke too soon. 

"Are you sure you don't want your Christmas gifts?" Dina asked as they exited the bowling alley that was a part of the local mall where they were going to shop together. "Because Deucey and I are really sorry for making you upset the other night. You should see him. He just mopes around the apartment, looking all sad and muttering about how he hurt his bestest friend in the world. You should see him. It's a little pathetic."

"Tell him that I'm okay," CeCe said, giggling. Though they had hurt her feelings that night, she understood why they asked her that. They only cared about Rocky and didn't want her to get hurt in all of CeCe's lies. She dodged someone that was going to run into her, sticking close to Dina's side, holding tight to her arm that she offered her after their round of bowling ended disastrously when CeCe threw the ball behind her and nearly hit an old man. "Flynn has said the same exact thing to me, so I'm used to it. Trust me."

"Okay," Dina said slowly. There was something in her voice that was making it less annoying, like she was actually thinking about something serious instead of mocking. "But I kind of want an answer to the question."

"I'm not sure when I'll tell Rocky." CeCe shrugged, her heart thudding in her chest at the prospect of telling her best friend that she lied to her. She knew it was wrong, but she didn't know how to fix it now. Yes, she knew that she should tell her everything, but that was easier said than done. Besides, CeCe's entire life rested on her dancing, and if she wasn't dancing, then she was a nobody. She didn't want to be a nobody to the people she loved most. "I've kept it a secret for two years now, so I know she'll be very upset with me."

"Why didn't you tell her in the first place?"

CeCe was quiet for a second, watching as the people rushed different places through the mall, trying to find their Christmas gifts that probably weren't there at the last minute. They were nearing the food court, which was a good thing because she was hungry after bowling. "I didn't want her to be disappointed in me," CeCe admitted, wringing her hands slightly. She hadn't really told anyone before about why she didn't admit the truth to Rocky or her mother about SIU and her job. "She's always been there for me, telling me that I can do so much, but here I am, working at Crusty's."

"Hey! Deuce works there!" Dina said loudly. Her annoying voice was back, especially because it rose about three notches, making a few people look at them in surprise.

"I know," CeCe said, nodding quickly. She had to figure out how to get her foot out of her mouth now. "That doesn't mean anything for him because he's worked there for a while and it's what he wants to do. I was a dancer on SIU, for goodness's sake. My life was so good before they kicked me off the show."

"That doesn't mean you can't make it good now," Dina said, nudging CeCe in the side. "Just because you work at a pizza shop doesn't mean that your life can't be great. Look at Deucey and me. Our life is amazing, and he works at Crusty's."

CeCe felt bad for saying those things. Dina just didn't understand the way CeCe felt. She held herself to a high standard, and what she was doing now fell way below the line. Besides, what was she without dancing? She was nothing. She had nothing else in her life that she loved more than dancing, and now it was taken away from her. How in the world could her life be good again? And her life got even worse when Rocky started slipping away from her. How could her life get any better if she couldn't dance and make more memories with her best friend? She didn't know.