Bachelor Series #1: Black Regoir (COMPLETED)

Epilogue

~BLACK REGOIR'S POV

"BLACK, TEN MINUTES. JUST ten minutes and we'll leave, okay?"

Summit tapped my shoulder as he assured me the time limit. And I only have ten minutes to say goodbye to her. Then after this, I will leave the country with an unknown time when to come back.

I heaved a deep sighed before nodding at him. My chest seems having a heart racing on how fast my heart pound. My eyes are also hot.

Damn.

"Okay, you're off to say goodbye now, buddy. Make it quick, I don't wanna be late," he added and gave me an encouraging smile.

"I'll try…" mababa ang boses na sagot ko at huminga ng malalim.

Mabigat na naman ang dibdib ko na kailanman hindi nilubayan ng matinding sakit.

"Here's your flowers, bud." Noriel also tapped my shoulder. "It's time to let go, now do it. You have to start a new life after this," he breathed harshly too.

As if letting go of the heavy feels inside his chest. Nangangatal akong tumango at tinaggap ang isang bouquet ng pulang rosas.

Sumandal silang dalawa sa nakasarang pinto ng kotse at namulsa habang tinatanguan ako.

Nagsimula na akong maglakad palapit sa damuhan kung saan nakalatag ang malinis at bago pa niyang libingan.

Her grave. Yes.

And while approaching near, my feet started to shake in the pain that suddenly surfaced within me.

It still hurt, knowing that she didn't survived. It's still painful. Going to her grave always rip my heart apart.

Papalit pa lang ako pero nangangatal na ang buo kong katawan at nanginginig ng sobra ang dalawa kong binti. Kahit ang lumunok ay hindi ko kayang gawin habang unti-unting inaaninag ang pangalan sa lapida.

Parang biglang may dumagang sobrang bigat sa dibdib ko. Bigla na lang din nagsibagsakan ang mga luha kong kanina pa nagbabadya.

Agad akong dahan-dahang napaluhod sa harapan ng kaniyang puntod. Nanginginig ang labing napaawang ako ng bibig para pakawalan ang mainit na hininga.

I gently put the flowers near her name and my hand dropped on it. I caressed her engraved name in the tile as my eyes shut tightly. Releasing more tears because of the lethal chest pain I'm receiving.

Littt by little, my knees fell upon the grassy ground too. I kneeled and slightly bent my back to bow down my head as hot tears trailed down.

It hurts so much. I still can't accept it. Baby, sweetheart…mamamatay ako sa sakit kapag hindi pa kita nakita. Mamamatay ako sa sobrang sakit.

"It's still p-painful…" my voice was hoarsed. It cracked as I bursted out of tears.

Napahawak ako sa dibdib kong parang binibiyak sa sakit habang lumuluha ng tahimik.

"B-Bakit mo naman ako iniwan….mahal na mahal kita…" patuloy sa pag-agos ang mga luha kong hindi ko alam kung saan galing.

It fucking hurts hundred folds, why her? Why not me? Sana ako na lang, sana hindi na siya.

"W-Why did you..let me suffer like this? Gusto mo ba akong mabaliw? Ha?" Kasi mababaliw na ako kakaisip sa'yo, sa araw na 'yon. Sa araw na iniwan mo'ko agad.

"Why you? Why not me?! Why not fucking me! Why did you leave me like this!" My voice raised and I fucking can't control the pain anymore. It's making me insane! Damn it!

"I'm going crazy! I'm losing my fucking mind! For Pete's sake! It hurts damn much, baby!" Nagsimula akong sumigaw at hampasin ang sariling dibdib. Inaakala na mamamanhid ako kapag ginawa kong saktan ang sarili ko.