Random stuff that's mostly incorrect quotes

✨Incorrect quotes except they're not for any book✨

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Grian: I want a boyfriend 

Iskall: It's about time

Grian: What are my options?

Iskall: well here we have Mumbo, he's super fancy and he'd treat you well and you'd pretty much be set for life- 

Here we have Impulse who is really nice and treats his mom well,

Here's Ren, he's obsessed with you, just overall a good guy. 

Grian: Mhm. 

Iskall: *looks at Taurtis* don't look at that guy he's mean and doesn't like you-

Grian: why doesn't he like me? 

Iskall: it doesn't matter he's a meanie

Grian: what's his name? 

Iskall: he doesn't matter ignore him

Grian: I want that one. The one who doesn't want me, yeah I like him.

Iskall: *grumble* stupid. Stupid as Hells.

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[Any two hermits]: *have an interaction*

Fans: shIP SHIP SHIP SHIP-

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Stress: *hanging out*

*A car full of boys comes up*

Stress: *thinking she's gonna get kidnapped or something*

Scar: *rolls down window* Hey, I really like you boba! Where'd you get it? 

Stress: *sigh of relief* it's just down the street! 

Doc: I told you SCAR!

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Grian: so not everyone has voices in their head that tell them to burn down everything they love? woah

Everyone else: *visible worry* 

Ex: FINALLY SOMEONE WHO UNDERSTANDS! 

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Cleo, hanging out with Joe: I've gotta go

Joe: No! Don't go!

Cleo: your free trial of hanging out with me has expired

Joe: *pulls out netherite* oh I'm willing to pay 

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Cleo: I knew I wasn't like other girls the day I started liking girls

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Wels: so I was just working out my nether portal- *Falls into Hels's trap* Ah carp, I can't believe you've done this

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Mycelium resistance: mushroom dance, mushroom dance, whatever could it mean?

HEP: IT MEANS YOU'VE LIVED A LIFE OF SIN

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Impulse: I hate always being imposter-

Tango: that's very sus of you to say-

Impulse: I MEANT CREWMATE I JUST MISSPEAKED

ImpulseSV was not the imposter 

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Xisuma: if you took a shot for every time you made a bad decision, how drunk would you be?

TFC: a bit tipsy?

Scar: drunk

Mumbo: there would be a shortage of shots

Grian, sweating: dead

Xisuma: Grian, why are you sweating? 

Scar: What did you do? 

*Bangs from the nearest closet* 

Mumbo: WHAT DID YOU DO?!?

Grian: Yes. 

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That's all I could come up with. Hope you enjoyed!