The Product Tester

Chapter 3

"O-ow!" Mary yelped, wincing away. "You're pinching me."

"Hold still. If you weren't moving so much, it wouldn't pinch. This has to be measured to your specifications, otherwise it'll just slide right off your waist." The tailor made a note of what was on his measuring tape, then moved from Mary's waist down to her thigh.

Mary almost blew off their comment, but she had to reconsider. It was a clue, after all. Maybe I could go on a super diet and slip out of it before the thirty days is-

"And before you go getting any ideas, your handler's going to notice if you suddenly drop in pant size, and you'll just be back in here for more of the same," the tailor pointed out, pinching the tape measure so he could hold it with one hand while making a note with the other.

Pressing her lips into a line, Mary asked, "Is this really the plan? Take measurements for every fuddy duddy that needs one of these covers and cut it specific?"

"Are you fishing for information, or genuinely curious?" He asked, moving on to her other thigh. "Last measurement, then you can put your hands down."

"Genuinely curious," Mary lied. "And I can put my pants back on, right?"

"For a minute, I suppose. They'll have to come right back off." The tailor checked Mary's other thigh, marked down the width. "Once we've got these in mass-production, we'll have a cover for every standard size combination. Since you're getting a prototype, we've got to cut it down to your measurements." Checking his notes, he added, "Or, possibly, stretch it out a bit."

Mary fumed, stepping off the raised platform and, just for spite, pulling up her pants. "So, what now?"

The tailor eyed her. "You did read the welcome packet, right?"

"I... skimmed it." Truth be told, she hadn't expected to be doing much when she came into the office, except to pass along the signed paperwork. Assuming the welcome packet at the back to be a standard template, she'd read the cover page and blown off the rest.

The tailor sighed. "Next door down on the left, they'll be ready for you."

"Thanks." Mary walked out of the small office, followed his instructions, and walked inside. "Hey, I'm Mary, here for the... uh... what's that?"

A nurse in scrubs looked up at her, adjusting the straps on... Mary wasn't sure what it was. It looked like an exam chair that her gynecologist might use, but next to it there was a stand with something that looked a lot like an IV bag, except...

"Ms. Bambine, good to see you. How did the measurement go?"

It was only then, breaking her gaze away from the exam chair, that Mary realized who the nurse was. "Katherine? What are you doing here?"

"I have a medical degree and a license," Kat explained, patting the exam chair. "Hop up!"

Mary wasn't quite ready to comply. "And why aren't you having someone else do this? Degree or no, isn't this a job for, like, an underling? A peon? Whatever you call the people you boss around."

Katherine raised an eyebrow. "Would you rather we get another stranger involved? I do as much hands-on work within my own projects as possible, when I can."

"I... I guess that's fine, then. What's all this for, anyways?"

That got more of a reaction out of the CEO. "Did you read your welcome packet?"

"I skimmed- look, just answer the question?"

Sighing, she walked over to the wall and picked up a clipboard. "We need to make sure that you can't try to hold it and then release all at once to cause a leak or create some sort of critical failure state in your diapers. A blowout, in colloquial terms. This would undermine the results of your entry attempts."