Odra at Seventeen

Chapter 1

My name is Odra.

I am a plain girl without any luster at all. I remember Barbra Streisand saying she'd rather be called ugly rather than plain. But that's what I am , a plain girl.
I am a good cook and if I cook, food melts in your mouth.
Maybe i got the skill from my dad. Not that my mom is a bad cook ,I just donot know if she can cook at. all
I really don't know her since she left us when I was barely 2 years old. She left and did not comeback
Childhood is lonely. had known that ice cream is cold when I was maybe about on fourth grade. You may laugh at me. But that's who I am, raised in a less fortunate family by my too conservative grandmother whom I love very dearly.
It will be our Junior-Senior Prom by the end of the month
My classmates go gaga on what to wear , what parlor they would go to , what color of hair plus the make,-up and eyebrows plus of course they talk about their partners mostly boys in the basketball varsity team .Me? I am here seated on a wooden bench thinking if we have something for lunch at all.
Well I'm used to this kind of life since I was a baby. And I do not have a drop of enviousness. I am happy with a bowl of rice and a cup of coffee in the morning for breakfast.
I didn't even have the chance to suck my mother's breast as she works away for our living. Neither was I raised and even had the cheapest Baby's milk. I grew up with powdered rice ok maybe mixed with a spoon of milk I am not really sure. But now, here i am tall and yes just tall.
Let me tell my story...
It was Christmas time, Mama made us feel her existence. Honestly , I was not excited to see her. .Maybe curious but I don't miss her. How could I miss a missing mother when I didn't how it feels to have one.
Daddy is not a responsible father but I have a father. That's enough for me to be a whole person. There is someone who truly loves me, Daddy.
Maybe, there is no mother to braid my long hair. But that is easy for me to do by myself. Modesty aside, I am good at a lot things.
At my age 17 , I have never experienced to have a crush on any guy nor to have guy look at me with admiration. As I have said ,I am a simple girl not worth a second glance
But I don't envy girls who have guys to walk them home and carry an umbrella for them when it rains.
Life had not been easy for me from domestic to school.
The girls are passing by now dressed like teen stars on TV. Not even one would ask me join.
Honestly, there things that I thought i have no right to like
There is this boy coming to school in a deep red Mio. Tall, neat with a pair of dimples to match his killer smile. I really get nervous when he glances at me . I look at the other side for him not to know how affected I am. But when asked about crushes? No, I don,'t have any.Well, my heart was not taught how to love a man no matter how good looking he may be.
I am now on grade 11, the so innocent girl has changed to a more daring barbecue stick. Too slim to wear sexy tight fitting shirts. I' d rather hide my frail body in this over sized hoodie to top m skinny jeans. This outfit makes me feel safe and protected.
One day , my crush came to my rescue for his assignment. He could be my crush, but one thing I hate in men is that they assume too much. I may be attracted to him, but I would not jump onto this chance spend sometime with him. I will help him alright but there is nothing more to it.One more thing, he should do something to finish this project and not just wait like a contented cow.
So, let me first know more about you. Just like me, you have a lonely childhood. Not that your parents are separated. There is no day that they don't quarrel even on very trivial matters. One should always be superior than the other. Both want to be the boss. Your Mother being the
head of Admin Dept. while Papa heads the Engineering.Dept. Papa soon became the father of the son of his secretary and he loves her more than your Ma. Papa comes home late saying he just had his dinner at the office with his secretary. Sadly, you said Mama eats with you and little sister Jenny. Papa retires to the study room to check on business matters. You did not complain of Papa,'s absence at the dining table. Ma starts nagging about Papa's womanizing but later cries in one corner.
My grandma say that Mama always bullied my Dad then. But now seeing him to be that irresponsible. I'm beginning to think I can't blame her my mother. I am glad now she found another man who makes her happy .Daddy,'s happy with a bottle of long neck. I am contented with their set,-up I tell myself "For as long as Daddy is happy, I have no qualms about it. When big sister got employed, I thought things would change. But sad to say, got pregnant by a guy she hardly knew. Now, sister is away living in with a lesbian.
Now , big brother had seemed to be responsible. But escaped responsibility. He made a life of his own taking a girl bigger than himself as a partner.
Now. I am alone in my fight.At this age, I'm building simple dreams. But Daddy had built his dream for me either to be a firefighter or a police woman. So be it. I just hoped Daddy asks what I want to take up in college. But it is well understood that I really do not have the right to choose because I can only take up anything that is free should i finish grade 12 with honors.
And if I don't , I will just stay home and do the household chores. This is my life and I cannot seem to change it.
Need I tell you about all these Burns ? I just have to remind myself who I really am So, stop dreaming you are not interested in me. I know. that I am just like a laptop that you can click on. Or so you thought.
What came into my mind in accepting your request? When the project is done what? Will you still dare come near me.? Will you even care talk to me? I bet not.