Set to "A Matter of Time"
"Therefore the Lord will wait, that He may be gracious to you. And therefore He will be exalted, that He may have mercy on you. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all those who wait for Him." ~Isaiah 30:18
~~~
An audience with my King
To hear these words uncouth
Yet bold by His blood, I begin:
"Sanctify me by Your truth"You, O King, Whom before
All thoughts, intents of man lay bare
Instruct me with Thy sword
In enduring mercy, hear my prayerThis is my confession
I look on and compare myself to others
Of whom You seem to be closer to, Father
Have I done something to make You resent?
And am too hardened to see and repent?Their faces shine with unbridled gladness
Like a lighthouse withstanding the storms of sadness
With greater boldness, they petition my Lord
Confident that in their darkness, He goes beforeBy my side, my King, have You continued to stay?
Or justly withdrawn because I continue to stray?
This veil of silence have You raised
Your voice and presence to replace?If I have retreated to take shelter within myself
Banking on my poverty rather than on Your wealth
Then send Mercy's fire to my self-confidence dispel
Reminding me of this: That no good within me dwellsOf Your Word
Though I have not kept
Yet You have said
You remember Your covenantBy this promised grace
I repent of these selfish ways
Though the past haunts behind me
With the shadows of regret
I know in facing Mercy and returning
I shall be blessedThough hidden is my course
Blanketed in Doubt's fog and cloud
(Your Spirit reminds me)
"He who trusts in the Lord
Him Mercy shall surround"Selah
But now Father, at this time
In seeking, will I surely find?
Even though You have written, I daily wrestle
As I am crushed in this Quiet's pestleI am gripped by my soul's feelings
As Your reserve leaves me reeling
I cannot melt away this fog concealing
In order for Your face to shine revealingWeary of wandering, blindly I grope
For some word that will cause me to hope
Will joy within, for You, ever be re-awoken
Or will You leave me self-afflicted and broken?In Life's emptiness my soul sighs
As I wait for One to reply
Though all I see surrounding
Are the wraiths of the night
You remind me to walk by faith
And not by feeling or by sightYour Spirit reminds me
Though You make the heavens to be as brass
So that no prayer or petition may pass
To Your Love-Letters I must hold fast
Close to my heart Your Face in clasp
Though You destroy my Life's rudder and mastThough from His children, He may hide
Yet within them, hidden, does He abide
He may choose to perform publicly or from the scenes behind
In either case, He will not grow weary continuing to lead and guideBeyond the boundaries of mortals' wisdom
High above their territories of knowledge, is another Kingdom
One that calls its redeemed subjects to come forth humbly foolish
Before their King Who takes pleasure in their faith audaciousDespite my rope being pathetically frayed
Does not annul His covenant of promise made
Though in silence and solitude I am held back and stayed
His Spirit reminds that: Today, yesterday and forever
He is the sameI would have lost heart over what's at stake
If I had not believed that Your goodness promised
I would see and taste
The knowledge of my plight and need, from You, is not hidden
I will surely see Your goodness in the land of the livingThough to Babylon's flames my body be condemned to burning
I will trust in His written promise that He bears no shadow of turning
I will trust in Him, though my life He takes
Even so, before Him, will I defend my own waysThough healing is withheld or my very life expires
Let my Father remain true and every man a liar
My turmoil cannot exceed the triumph of His test
Though He has chastened me severely
The Lord has not given me over to deathOf this season, I will not seek to manipulate
That His word to fulfill might excelerate
He is Perfect-Love, who authors my Fate
He shall surely perfect and bring to pass
As I await"And it will be said in that day: “Behold, this is our God; We have waited for Him, and He will save us. This is the Lord; We have waited for Him; We will be glad and rejoice in His salvation.” ~Isaiah 25:9
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