Walk of Nightmares

Chapter 5 - Discussions

Vader stands there for a long time, arms crossed, as Luke disappears into the darkness of the forest along with his sister and friends. Yoda's Force ghost vanishes, but Obi-Wan's remains standing there, still staring at him, expression filled with sadness and regret.

"Anakin," he begins, and before Vader can yell at him to stop talking, because that's not his name, Obi-Wan continues, "I'm sorry." That... was not what he had expected somehow. He'd expected a lecture or something filled with the usual condescending attitude the Jedi always seemed to show him.

He scoffs, the noise sounding strange through his vocoder. "Whatever for?"

"For failing you," Obi-Wan replies with genuine regret. "For leaving you to die. For not seeing what Sidious was doing to you. For not being the master you needed. For not helping you when you needed it."

Vader can deal with antagonism, but this, this is something else entirely, and he has no idea how to respond. He's still somewhat is shock over the sudden turn of events, and if it had been up to him, he would have died killing Sidious so as to escape this. But that would have hurt Luke immensely, so he didn't take the easy way this time.

He'll become Emperor. He'll dismantle the Empire and change it back into a Republic because that's what his son wants, and truthfully, he's become tired of fighting. That's all he's done in his life, and he – he doesn't actually know what he wants to do. He wants to have his family back, something which isn't possible, at least not right now. Maybe not ever. He thinks about Leia, and how he treated her on the Death Star. He doesn't deserve her forgiveness. He doesn't deserve his son's love either. He joined Sidious to protect them, but he didn't even do that.

Obi-Wan is still standing there, still watching him, probably sensing that he's trying to process everything. "Sorry does not change anything," Vader states flatly, the words as much to his former master as they are to him.

"No," Obi-Wan agrees softly, "But it's a start, and all we can do is show others that we mean it."

"I do not care how the galaxy sees me," Vader retorts harshly. "In their eyes, I will always be a monster. Nothing I do will change that."

Obi-Wan sighs, moving closer. "Maybe you don't care for the galaxy, but you do care for your children, Anakin. You've proven that it's never too late for someone to change. The very act of destroying Sidious has freed you from his chains. I'm no longer alive, but I will still do my utmost to help you."

Vader pretends that the words don't send a twinge of guilt through him, because he's the one who killed his former master, his best friend. "Why?" he asks, honestly confused. "After everything I did to the Jedi, to you, why would you want to help me?"

"Because, whether I like it or not, I still care for you," Obi-Wan tells him quietly, the barest hint of a smile on his face. "And I know you will do anything to keep your children safe. Their lives are no longer in such perilous danger because of the Sith. Sidious is gone, and you, I don't believe you will force them to join you in the Dark. On the contrary, I believe you will let them guide you back to the Light."

Vader turns away, unwilling to face the painful truth in Obi-Wan's words. Much as he doesn't want to ask, there is one thing which he's desperate to know. "Obi-Wan, did – did I kill her?" He doesn't need to give a name; Obi-Wan already knows to whom he is referring.

There's a long pause, and Vader can nearly feel Obi-Wan weighing the pros and cons of telling him the truth. "No," he says at last. "You didn't. She would have survived, but... the medical droids believed she gave up. The woman I knew would never have done that, not when her children needed her."