Unscripted love

15. Moonlight

Demet

I feel like I'm floating. I feel incredibly alive. A gentle warmth, I feel good. Curled up in his powerful arms, my hands in his neck so that he doesn't escape me, our lips sealed, I savour these moments of plenitude. I've wanted to since the first day my eyes met his, in this bar, on the edge of the pavement, long before we became colleagues.

Why ?How ? I don't really care at this moment.

Perhaps it was the alcohol that destroyed all my apprehensions?

I end up freeing his mouth, almost out of breath. His intense gaze makes me blush. I still look at his lips...so soft...moist, red from our kisses.

None of us speak and I feel much less sure of myself all of a sudden. Even a hint of anxiety begins to take hold of me as my brain starts to work again.

What will it think? That I am an actress who easily succumbs to her partners? That I'm jumping into his arms at the first opportunity when I've probably just broken up with my boyfriend? He will probably think that I don't know how to behave...

And I feel nauseous. I turn around and walk towards the sea and I start to vomit, my discomfort is uncontrollable. Between each convulsion I find it hard to catch my breath. Can is already next to me helpless.

After about thirty seconds, the shaking calms down. Can supports me with his left arm and caresses my right hand with his other free hand.

Without exchanging a word he helps me to sit down on the small wall and looks at me gently, caressing my hair.

I am ashamed and I would like to find a hole to hide in.

Making sure I'm a little better, he gets up and calls me. I hear him talking to Anil and then Beste and a few minutes later I am with him in a taxi, a blanket around me. He takes me in his arms, lets my head fall against his shoulder and caresses my skin with the pulp of his fingers. My head is spinning, I'm half conscious, I'm shivering, I just want to sleep.

Sleep and forget this evening...well...only part of it.

I dozed off when the taxi stopped. Can helps me get out, supports me and sets the course before we enter his building. I am just as uncomfortable showing up like this as I am happy to be with him. Every moment that he holds me in his arms to support me, comes closer, I perceive his perfume mixed with his own body odor and I can feel those thousands of butterflies in the hollow of my belly .

I take off my heels and he takes me in his arms to climb the stairs. I let myself go in the hollow of his neck, still savoring the smell and warmth of his skin. Finally, in a way, I feel so good...

I feel so vulnerable and yet so strong...

He puts me in front of his door and grabs his keys. He smiles at me and caresses my cheek tenderly. He is so cute, so attentive...

Once inside, he grabs my hand and drags me into his room, we still haven't said a word. He opens his bathroom and goes back and forth several times, dropping me off to change and take a shower.

« Are you going to be all right? »

« Yes Can, thank you... »

« Take everything you need. I'll make some tea, OK? »

I thank him with my eyes and he still gives me his tender smile. How can I resist such a smile?

In the shower I let the almost hot water relax my muscles. I feel that I'm starting to feel better and the bad effects of alcohol dissipate. My thoughts are still confused, I feel like I've been through a thick fog. I can see Seckin's angry face again. We couldn't go on like this...we were going to hurt each other unnecessarily.