Help (Moonbae)

13: The Days of Depression

Jacob was being hit by a really deep wave of depression- and that wasn't meant as anything dramatic.

He had actually been diagnosed with PTSD and depression when he had gone into the homeless shelter. They made sure that all of their tenants were tested for any disorders that would harm themselves or others. So Jacob definitely knew what depression felt like.

And usually, it would be really easy to distract himself- since he was always super busy, but now, it was proving to be harder than ever before. He had somewhat of an idea why.

Kevin made him happy.

Kevin made him genuinely smile and laugh. Something that was proven very hard to do. And by turning him down and making him upset, he only made himself upset. And it wasn't like he could apologize to Kevin, since the younger boy had been avoiding both the florist and the grocery store.

Kevin on the other hand, felt embarrassed and plain stupid.

How could he have been stupid enough to believe that Jacob liked him? He knew that he should have kept his stupid crush to himself, but no. He just had to go and ruin his friendship with Jacob.

This hadn't ever really happened to him. Kevin had never been on a date. He had never bothered to ask anyone on one, and he had never been asked on one. But he had managed to work up the courage to finally ask someone on a date and then he was rejected- like the idiot he was.

And to make matters worse, his ADHD was really starting to worsen. He knew that he had to start taking the medication soon, or else some really bad things would happen, but he couldn't even be bothered to leave his own bed. 

He wasn't depressed, he was just very drained- a side effect of not taking medication for ADHD.

If it wasn't for Sunwoo and Chanhee, he wouldn't have been eating either. They always came over during meal times, since they both lived in an apartment pretty close to Kevin's own.

Needless to say, he was a mess.

And to make things worse, when he had finally worked up the strength to get out of bed and eat, he was out of edible food. Everything he could have once eaten had expired. And it wasn't like he could just go to the grocery store and get some more food because everything was closed at 1:30 in the morning.

And then the realization hit him. He had to go to the grocery store where Jacob worked.

He didn't even try and talk himself out of it. Maybe if he just went and faced him everything would be fine, right? They were friends before and they could still be friends.

Kevin slipped his shoes on and began to drive over to the store. When he got there, he noticed something that made his heart drop. Jacob wasn't there.

He had never seen Jacob miss a day of either of his jobs. He was always working.

There was definitely something wrong.