PULL (BXB)

Snippy

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***Sebastian's POV***

"Fuck. Ow." My foot collides with the dresser. I swear to hell, I'm burning this massive piece of furniture.

"Babe? Do you need help?" Mark calls from near the bed.

"I'm fine." I whine through the pain. Am I fine? Hell, no. My toe is throbbing. I'm in pain. I would prefer to let them draw blood.

Grumbling all the way to the bathroom, I stumble to the toilet. A sigh leaves my lips as I release the full stream that was just punishing my bladder.

It's like everything is so damn sensitive. Every single pain is continuously amplified. I get it, I have an illness. But, must my body remind me relentlessly that I'm less than perfect.

It's frustrating. Really. I just want to be back on my A-game. Mark deserves that from me.

He doesn't want or need a pathetic boyfriend. Grown ass men shouldn't be in tears over a stubbed toe.

"Stop that." I peek my eyes over at Mark. He stands with crossed arms against the bathroom door frame. Mark eyes me suspiciously.

"Stop what?" I practically accuse Mark with my question. I'm not in the fucking mood this morning.

"Berating yourself for having a weakness. You're human, Sebastian. We all are." Mark stands over the sink, brushing his teeth.

"I don't see you fussing over something as simple as a bruised toe or a full bladder." I'm irritated, snappy. I can feel it work through me like a brush through knotted hair. I'm completely sensitive today.

"Well, open those denim blues. I threw the lamp last night because it was in my way. I'm not perfect either." Mark chuckles. I know he threw the fucking lamp. I heard it crash to the ground.

I don't blame him. The damn thing wouldn't stop flickering.

"I'm just tired." I shake off the emotions that are forcing their way out through any avenue.

Walking past Mark, I barely brush my fingers against his skin. I don't feel like being pampered. Anyone could just have a bad day. No, I'm having a whole fucking bad week, month and year.

"Please stop. For me. Just be yourself. Let it out." Mark wraps his arms around me. His chin rests on my shoulder while he pulls my back to his chest.

"You want me to be human? Be careful what you ask for babe." I kiss Mark's hand before turning in his arms.

"I want you to do whatever makes you feel better. I want you to say what is on your mind. If you feel something, I want to know about it. You can be honest without fear that you are pushing me away. I'm not going anywhere that doesn't lead me to you." Mark brushes his thumb over my cheek. I sigh in contentment.

He is right. I have to trust him.

"I'm angry because I'm not healing at the pace I expected to. I'm frustrated because a simple bruise feels like a punch to my stomach. I'm tired. I am tired of being so damn tired. I just want to get better so you don't have to watch me struggle. I just want to be fair to you." My words are as exhausted as I feel.

"Thank you. Now, you're stupid, love. I don't like watching you struggle. But, I don't see weakness. No, I see a man fighting for me. For yourself, yes, but for me as well, you fight. I see every obstacle you face, knowing that there are so many more that I can't begin to imagine. You are strong. I love you because you care so fucking much about how I see you. So, let's go there. I see you as beautiful, strong and incredible. I love every bit of you. I love this life that includes you. If it's not with you, for you, then I would not want it at all. Now, kiss me and stop being snippy." Mark raises his head while my lips find his.