Another similar day, noticed early in the morning it's storming, my mind is being flooded. I might need an Arc, save two of each thought to ensure survival. Maybe transfer my conscience to an unknown void where I'll live in peace with no mind to fight against my own beliefs. No anxiety to attack my fears, a never ending respite with no guilt in my ears.
Let's be honest though, It's never going to happen. Darkness does not rest, attacking every flank constantly with renewed forces daily. I set up my defenses, but I was not counting on this storm today. The armies of the dark win this fight. Hopefully they shall not win the war, for that would mean certain death. What might seem an escape at times, actually feeds the dark, as you leave your afflictions pass on to your loved ones, spreading like a virus. Condemning more and more people to years of suffering and depression.
Perhaps a moment of respite will come where I will appreciate what I've done. Realize I'm much more than what my mind tells me. Look at the world and not see billions of robots ready to compete for higher salaries, showing everyone their edited perfect lives. One day depression shall frighten the masses, finally be respected as the curse that it is. A curse I have fought since my first memory. My resolve was tested by demons out of flowing rivers of blood. Many fights were lost by fear alone, insomnia and panic attacks from catapults aimed to awaken my madness.
It all returns today. I stand cornered, ambushed by stabbing fears and bombs of self doubt, I'm trying to get out but nothing seems to work, I may remain in this dark storm for days on end.
Won't even try to pretend.
