What Should Have Been

Making an Entrance (?)

Slowly, Kakashi and Sakura walk down the long hallway side-by-side. There are the double doors that lead to the large room in which the ceremony will be held - now right in their sights. Sakura's heart pounds more and more quickly with each step. Now... she's been in many frightening, life or death situations, but she doesn't think she's ever felt this light-headed in her entire life. She knows she has to do something once her breath shallows out and dark spots begin to dot her vision - her body's way of telling her that she's going to faint. She begins to reach for Kakashi-sensei.

The legendary copy ninja is now sweating profusely in his suit. He looks down at his shaking palms and hopes Sakura doesn't notice. I don't want to make her even more nervous than she already is, he thinks. Knowing her, she's biting her lip, worried over tripping or messing up her vows in front of everyone. He can practically smell her fear and wants so badly to turn to her and comfort her, console her. However, he has to console himself first, or he'll only make matters worse if she sees him like this.

This is my duty, he tells himself. I show up. I complete the mission. I leave. Except in this mission, there are no winners and no losers... no losers besides me- No, I'm being selfish. I promised. I gave my word. I have to follow through. I have no choice. Let's go over this one more time, Kakashi. Walk her down the aisle and... hand her over?? Kakashi shakes his head furiously at the thought. He simply cannot fathom it. All he wants to do is grab her hand and run away, far away from here....

Kakashi has a sudden flashback.

~"Hey, Kakashi-sensei..." Sakura's shaky voice broke through the calm silence.

I looked up from my tea, instantly sensing that she was nervous about something. "Yes, Sakura?" I frowned slightly, suddenly concerned.

"I, uh... the wedding is only a few weeks away...." I watched as she bumped her knuckles together and looked to her side, her mouth set in a grimace. She was so clearly uncomfortable.

I set my teacup back down on the table, a lot more loudly than I had intended and cleared my throat. "Oh, yeah..." I said, tugging on my collar. "the... wedding. That's a big deal!" I almost cringed at my attempt to sound optimistic.

She didn't notice, though. Her discomfort somehow intensified. "Well, I wouldn't call it a 'big deal.' We've been dating for years now...."

"Well... sure, but... this is your wedding day we're talking about. Usually, I don't care for such things, but my former students are now all grown up and getting married. Wow, it's sort of strange to think about, really." I rubbed the back of my neck nervously. I caught myself quickly, starting back up with more fake enthusiasm. "And... and the whole village will be there! All of your friends and family... that's exciting! And... you'll become one of the Uchiha and, together, you and Sasuke will restore the clan...." I trailed off, really wishing I hadn't said that last part. I was just talking myself into an absolute frenzy by that point, rambling on, my own words beginning to nag at me. Not to mention, I had started to say things that only someone like Ino would say to Sakura. I fought the urge to cringe and looked to Sakura to gauge her reaction.

She was staring straight past me with her lips parted slightly. Her eyes were wide and filled with what I could only identify as sheer terror as her shaking hands clutched the side of the table. Way to go, Kakashi dumbass. You somehow managed to make things much, much worse. I scolded myself.

"Sakura... Sakura!" I called to her, but it was no use. She felt so far away in that moment. I reached across the table, leaning forward to gently place my fingertips against one of her shaking knuckles. Suddenly, her eyes met mine, and I watched her slowly return back to Earth. Slowly, her knuckles relaxed underneath my touch -- no longer gripping the table. Still, she was shaking like a leaf. I moved to take her hand into both of mine comfortingly. "So, what is it you were trying to say about the wedding, Sakura?" I asked in a tone that I hoped was soothing.

"Oh... that! I... uh..." She glanced away once again and bit her lip. "Well, I... was wondering if... maybe... if it wouldn't be too much trouble... maybe you could... if you wanted to, that is... "

I hadn't seen her that flustered in a long time. "Spit it out, Sakura." I chuckled, although I regarded her with kind eyes.

Her eyes returned to mine, and she gave a small, embarrassed smile, blushing slightly. She moved her free hand to lay on top of mine. Now, our hands were just layered in between us like we were playing some kind of game, and she was winning. "Would you walk me down the aisle, Kakashi?" She finally blurted.

I gawked at her blankly. Many conflicting emotions washed over me all at once. I had never expected her to say those words. My heart first swelled with pride and honor. Me - of all people she asked me, I thought. Then, my heart began to hammer in my chest instead. Me... of all people she chose me? I was in shock and disbelief. I was nervous and horrified. How was I going to do this? How could I possibly do this when...?

I realized I'd hesitated for too long, and Sakura came back into focus. It was then that I realized I could do this, because I had to -- because she'd asked. I would do anything for Sakura, even if it crushed my heart (and this most defintely would). I had risked my life for her too many times to count, and I had to admit that if it came down to it, I would die for her, too. How could I say this was too much?

Right as I was about to respond, she began to speak again, her words rushing out. "You- you don't have to if you don't want to! No pressure! I just... um... as you know, my dad passed last year, and I don't really have anyone else who could.... And- and we've grown so much closer over these past few years, and I'm so grateful for that- that I have someone like you in my life. You're- you're sort of like a... father to me-"

I frowned here.

"No! No! Not like a father - that's weird! You're a friend and a really good friend at that! And you were my teacher... a really good teacher! You taught me so much, and you were always a huge inspiration to me.... So... so, it would mean a lot to me if- if..."

I don't know why I let her go on for so long, given that she was clearly struggling. I suppose I was touched by some of her words and simply wanted to hear what she had to say. However, I realized quickly that was cruel of me in this situation and interrupted her there. "Sakura... Sakura..." I cooed until she stopped. "Of course... I'd be happy to." I affirmed sincerely.

"Really?" Her voice raised an octave.

"Yes, yes." I swallowed. "Even though I don't think of you as a... daughter..." I choked the word out. "because... as we both know... I'm far too young for that... you are someone who is very precious to me. I would be honored to be a part of your big day."~

Kakashi's flashback ends.

Kakashi's POV:

"Kakashi-sensei..." Her waivering voice pulls me out of my reverie as a clammy hand grasps my wrist. I immediately stop in my tracks and turn to face her, my eyes roving her face. Her bottom lip trembles, and her eyes practically shake as she breathes, "Get me out of here."

Now, that... I can do.