Second Chances [Lesbian]

Chapter 18

After the appointment with my therapist the next week, I walked out of her office both empowered and conflicted. I knew I had to talk to Whitney about Cameron. She was now a part of my life and that meant that she'd also become a part of Eliza's life. Dr. Brooks had encouraged me to initiate the conversation and to hold strong.

Easier said than done.

I trusted her completely, and I trusted myself. She didn't know Whitney personally, though. The conflict swirling around in my head didn't concern me, though. I'd learned how to deal with her; was still learning. My main concern would always be Eliza. How would she take the news? Would she get along and be okay with Cameron? She wasn't so little anymore. She had her own perspective and opinions. She was also largely influenced by the parent she lived with 90% of the time.

As I got home, I dialed the familiar number.

"Hey, you." Just hearing her voice always made me warm all over.

"Hi.. what are you doing?"

"Drowning in paperwork and files. Just another day in paradise."

"I just got back from seeing Dr. Brooks.."

"How did it go?" Her tone hadn't changed at all.

I had told her about my therapist hesitantly a few days before and she hadn't batted an eye. It made things so much easier to know that it didn't scare her.

"It was a good session. Um.. she suggested that I sit down with Whitney to talk about you. Us.. our relationship."

There was a pause before she responded. "What do you think about that?"

"Well, I know I should.. and this isn't really about her, but.. with Eliza.." I trailed off.

"I'd love to get to know her," she said softly and it made the warmth in my chest grow.

"Cameron, I don't want it to seem like I'm rushing things, and I know we haven't known each other very long, and I know you said that baggage didn't matter.. I don't want to pressure you by suddenly bringing up talking to my ex-wife about you or you being around my daughter.. I guess what I'm saying is, if this.. us is umm, maybe like more of a fun thing, or if it's just too much.. I mean, I know you called me your girlfriend, but if it's more like casual dating.. I think some people prefer that, but-"

"Ren," she interrupted me, saying my name in the way only she could, "you're rambling. While it is always amusing and cute.. just, stop thinking about it so much. Remember? No bullshit. We're together. I care about you and I think talking to Whitney is probably a good idea. I'd love to get to know your daughter. Does that make it easier?"

"Yes.. and no. I wish it were simple."

There's just.. a lot of stuff there that is complicated.

"I know. If I can make it easier in any way, I will."

"Will I see you soon?"

"Of course. We still have lights to untangle, right?" she teased.

***

"Whitney, the last time you were here, you asked me something."

"Yeah, and?" She sat at my kitchen table while Eliza used the backyard swing. Though she didn't use it as often anymore, the wide wooden seat with the thick rope was one of her favorite spots.

"I just wanted us to have a conversation about it." I sat across from her, trying to disguise how uncomfortable I felt.

"Not much to talk about, Ren. We're divorced. It's none of my business if you date around or not." She raised an eyebrow.