YELLO | SEVENTEEN's 14th member

RECORDING GOES WRONG

"I'm sorry, I'll do it again." I let out a cough, covering my mouth so the members wouldn't hear it. We were recording the song for the vocal unit and I've spent thirty minutes in the booth trying to record this one line.

I've gotten a small cold, it wasn't that big so I decided to go on with the recording. I was lucky that Jihoon was on the bright side today and was generous enough to let me retry as much as I could.

"Hyung, can I let the other members go first? I don't want to let them wait for too long."

I could feel my head pound, and I was trying my best not to show my discomfort. Jihoon looked up from his notepad, as I stare back at him, hoping that he'd let me do so. I felt bad for dragging them so I decided it was best that I'd go last.

But it seemed like a certain someone else wasn't in the mood today.

"It's fine, go take a brea–"

"What's wrong with you? Why do you keep on messing up?"

I felt my heart drop at his sudden outburst. I was a sensitive person, and hearing words like that from someone who I didn't expect made it hurt more.

"I'm taking a breather." I ignored his words, keeping my head down as I exit the booth. I could feel all the eyes on me and it immediately made me feel uncomfortable.

Making one eye contact with Jihoon, who quickly sent me a worried look, I looked away and went outside. But before I could even take a step out, the person stopped me with his hand.

"Tell me, what's wrong with you? You're not like this." The aggressive tone in his voice made my heartbeat slow down. I didn't like how this was going. It was making my headache worse.

"Jeonghan, please. Not now." I managed to blurt out in a whisper, too tired to be arguing with him. The mention of his name made him look at me, but it didn't stop the growing fear inside of me. I wanted to avoid getting into a fight with him as much as possible.

"No! I can't stand seeing you perform so poorly. It gets on my nerves." Jeonghan's voice laced so much hatred and anger, it made me feel like I had committed a crime. A crime that I didn't even do.

"Why? Why are you so damn bothered? Can't you just mind your own fucking business?" The pain I was feeling was executed in a way that I didn't expect it would.

"Why can't you just leave me alone like you always do? Why are you even attacking me for something that I can't have control over?" I let out all my pent up emotions, tears slightly swelling in my eyes.

Crying was something I do that I had never showed to others. I didn't like to use crying as a way to express my pain and sadness. And, maybe I had stopped myself from crying too much that it had made me use another way of expressing my pain– anger.

"It's not like you also do well, don't you?! You made mistakes too, don't you? Did I ever say something? No! I didn't!" My sudden outburst shocked everyone in the studio. I was one who never liked raising my voice in a negative manner. But a time has come where I'm unable to control it.

Words that constantly left my mouth left him quiet, unable to say anything. Jeonghan's eyes widen upon realizing the words that he had told me.

Panick immediately rised in him, as he was a cluster of mess, not knowing what to say. The same went to the other members. They didn't know how to respond, as this was probably my first outburst in five years.

I used to have fights with other trainees in my pre-debut days, but it took a toll on me when I realized that it was ruining my relationship with them. That's when I knew that I should change for the better, and I did. Never did I try to cause a fight with anyone, afraid that I'd also ruin our relationship.

"I- I'm sorry, Yonhae. I was stresse–"

"But so am I, hyung. Aren't we all?" I scoffed at his pathetic excuse. It was truly angering, how he was blaming me for something that I couldn't even avoid. I would have done it properly if I could, didn't I?

Seeing as how he wasn't going to respond any time, I had enough of it and decided to leave the studio, wanting to get rid of the forming headache I have.

We didn't talk to each other for weeks, but here I was, eating out with him, as if nothing had happened. I guess you could say it kind of strengthened our relationship, quite opposite to what I expected.