I like funny stuff. I like challenges. I like bacon crumbled on coffee-flavored ice cream. Put them all together and what have you got? A #wattpadwednesday writing prompt. See list below for details.
A - Absent-minded: The act of being so lost in thought that one is unaware of one's immediate surroundings. It's nice to know there's a diagnosis for it. Now, where did I put the remote?
B - Big Bang Theory: Currently, my go-to sitcom when I need a laugh. Penny - "It's the things you love that make you who you are." Howard - "Then I guess that makes me large breasts."
C - Claustrophobia: It started when I was a kid. I would let my brother roll me up in the braided rug in our living room. He would promise to let me go then sit on me and laugh while I screamed. Why did I let him talk me into that so many times?
D - Daughters: I have four of them. One rescues manatees, one writes legalese in an office with a window, one likes to dance at music festivals, and one still has me immersed in science projects and slumber parties. I am totally blessed and frequently sleep deprived.
E - Ears: I have two of them, and both allow me to hear the multitude of musical genres and artists I listen to on a daily basis. If I couldn't listen to music, I'd be one miserable wretch. The stench would be great.
F - Flatulence aka Fart: By far, the funniest thing our body does, providing an endless supply of potty jokes and suppressed laughter at inappropriate times.
G - Gilmore, as in David: The soul of Pink Floyd, in my opinion, and a musician who has perfected the art of making a guitar sing.
H - Harry Potter: I credit this young wizard and the writer who created him, JK Rowling, for sparking my interest in writing and reading, particularly fantasy, since I consider reality to be a little disappointing.
I - Internet: OMG. I totally (heart) the internet. Who knew cats could be so damn funny.
J - John Lennon: My favorite Beatle and my number one pick for people who died too soon.
K - Kenny, as in Kenny Sampson: Las Vegas musician, my dad, and the funniest man I've ever known. He's the person I credit for my lifelong fart obsession.
L - Las Vegas: The town where I was born and raised, and the place where many happy couples have been wed by Elvis. I bet you didn't know he was still alive and well and practicing as an ordained minister at the Chapel on the Strip.
M - M.A.S.H.: The best show to ever grace the TV screen. No war has ever made so many laugh.
N - Non-GMO: I'll take my food minus the genetically modified organisms, thank you.
O - Old stuff: Particularly castles in Europe. My dream vacation is to finally use my passport (also old) to visit a castle, preferably one with a moat filled with grindylows.
P - Pizza: Best food ever invented, when it is properly done, and first choice for my last meal.
Q - Quisp: My favorite cereal growing up. It tasted like Captain Crunch and caused mild irritation to the roof of the mouth due to its scouring pad texture. Yum.
R - Rum, as in the Captain Morgan spiced variety: A lovely addition to Coke that I discovered during my days of club hopping. I haven't given up the rum or the clubs, just the hopping.
S - Smite, as in to strike with a sword: A word that bears a serious meaning, but that sounds like it's not sure of itself. "Is that sword going to hurt me? It smite."
T - Turtle: My idea of an awesomely cool animal, especially the sea variety. Maybe I like them because they are among the longest living animals and never have to leave their house.
U - Under the covers: The place where I used to visit the fairies that lived in my room when I was a child. Sadly, the fairies left shortly after Mom left Dad.
V - Vegetarian: Three of four daughters are herbivores, thus encouraging the whole family to eat healthier. I still eat things with legs, but I choose only the free range versions. Better karma.
W - Westerfeld, as in Scott: Author of the Leviathan series and another writer who inspires me.
X - Xylophone: A percussive instrument. Every kid had a toy xylophone with rainbow-colored bars and wooden mallet. Being from a musical family, Dad had a real one in his music room. We also had a Cuica (pronounced kuweeca). Look that one up.
Y - Yoga: My favorite form of exercise, mainly because it doesn't involve jumping, running, or heavy lifting. Downward dog? I can do that.
Z - Zero: There are zero reasons why we all can't be nice to each other.
Buzzmama signing off. Peace out.
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Because Life Should Be Unruly
RandomThis is a space for my bits and bobs, contest entries, and stuff I don't know what else to do with. If you like your writing with no agenda, read on Macduff.
