I don't think the death of my father really hit me until I walked into his house, it's like a flip had switched making me realize both my parents had left this world, leaving me and chanbyeok by ourselves.
His things lay just how he left them. The house was always orderly just how he liked it.
"A place for everything and everything in its place" He always used to say.
"How about we start in the attic and work out way down to the basement?"
Chanbyeok said scanning the house looking at all the pictures of us hanging up on the wall.
"Yeah sounds like a plan."
My voice broke as I answered him, I went up the steps and stepped into my old room. The room Namjoon found me in all those years ago.
(TRIGGER WARNING TRIGGER WARNING TRIGGER WARNING TRIGGER WARNING TRIGGER WARNING TRIGGER WARNING⚠⚠⚠⚠ SKIP TO EXCLAMATION POINTS)
Taelins POV four years ago.
Its been three months since my mom died, I can't take it anymore. I just began to open up to her, god why didn't I talk to her???
My mind went numb as I looked into the mirror, looking at myself disgusted me, horrified me. The way my face was puffed up from crying and my runny nose now red and irritated, my eyes almost blood shot red from hours of crying.
Without thinking i grabbed it turned on the bath, making sure the water was warm.
The razor slid over my scabbed up scars so effortlessly, like they weren't even there.
I cut deeper than usual..this is the last time I would be here, in this tub, feeling this hopeless.
I stared at the ceiling as my vision started to fade, fade, fade, fade.
I was so tired, the crimson red blood mixed with the water that was now starting to overflow.
I was so tired, I could just sleep. Sleep my life away.
"TAELIN?!"
I was too out of it to even realize Namjoon was even there as I got closer to passing out.
"I'M COMING IN!!"
My body felt so cold even I was submerged in hot water.
BANG
BANG
BANG
I was finally getting what I wanted...
"TAELIN!!"
(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
"Taelin!"
I jolted awake looking directly to the bathroom and then to Chanbyeok.
"Are you alright Linnie?"
I nod silently and stood up and stretched. Chanbyeok leads the way to the attic and I follow behind him.
Hours had passed and we'd gone through most of the things up there and had decided to call it a night and go back to our rooms.
It felt weird sleeping in the house again, I could almost hears moms shuffling downstairs as her insomnia used to keep her up at night and keep her cleaning.
I closed my eyes and started to drift off until I heard my phone ding.
I reluctantly check my phone knowing I would fuck up my sleep progress.
Hobi:
hey are you down to get something to eat?
Wallflower:
is that even a question?
Hobi:
alright lol do you want me to pick you up again?
Wallflower:
no no just text the address I'm omw
i got up quickly throwing on a different pair of jeans and a hoodie grabbing my keys.
I should probably tell chanbyeok...
After some deliberation I decided to leave him a little note and got in my car just as Hoseok texted his address to me.
The drive was a little longer than expected but that was fine, at least id be hanging out with Hoseok. I knocked on his door and almost instantly he opened it.
"Waiting up for me huuuuh?"
I teased and a small blush crept up onto his face.
"That's just because you took longer than you said and I was worried."
"I'm just teasing, come on so we can go eat!"
We ended up walking to a small little cafe that wasn't far from Hoseoks house.
We talked for hours but it had only felt like a few minutes. I guess he had that effect on everyone, able to pull them into a conversation and keep them trapped there as long as they didn't check the time.
"You can stay at my place tonight it is kinda late to be driving Taelin."
I looked at him and my eyes met his, I couldn't tell his emotion, it was unreadable. My brows clashes together as I spent more time trying to figure out what was going through his head instead of answering his offer.
"Lin?"
I snapped back into reality and shook my head
"My brother would have my head, I'll just go back to him and see you... Later on today?"
I said as I checked my phone and Hoseok chuckled.
We both paid our bill and headed back to his place. We said our goodbyes and I left going to stop by my apartment.
To my surprise Namjoon wasn't there.
Good.
I grabbed my extra charger and some more clothes as I knew I'd be staying a while. I grabbed some of my shower products also knowing I would hate the smell of my old one that still sat in that there in that bathroom.
After grabbing everything I left making sure to lock my door and took my spare key as payback for him snitching on me.
Let's see you try and eat my food now Namjoon...
