All There Is

Chapter 13-Tessa

           It's been 3 days since I've seen Hardin.School has begun and he seems very busy, with his girlfriend.And school I guess but still with this girlfriend.I haven't gone back to the dorm since then.Landon being my best friend has let me crash at the frat house for a while.

"Tessa!"I hear someone yell, breaking me from my 'sleep'.The reality is that I have been laying in bed staring at the ceiling and just thinking about how I'm such a whore.I knew he had a girlfriend yet I still sucked his eggplant.Fucking hell.I always had one rule and that was too never be the other woman yet here I am in the frat house being the other woman."Tessa, wake up you have to go school."The voice calls again, the voice of my best friend,Landon.

"No."I groan, turning my head into the pillow."I'm sleeping."I continue saying into the pillow.

"Get up Tessa.You need to go to school.You can't let Hardin think that you are his bitch."Landon lectures as he hits my foot.

"I.Don't.Care"I say into my pillow with a groan.

"You know what?"I hear him say which causes me to slightly pop an eye open.I then feel my body loose the bed from under it and in no time I am on the floor.

"Hey!What was that for?"I ask rubbing my head and pushing myself to stand up from the floor.

"You need to stop laying around my house and being sad.Plus I haven't been able to have sex in the past 3 days out of respect for you and I'm gonna bust a nut."He exclaims as he throws a pillow at me.

"Wow.What a real friend."I sarcastically remark with a roll of my eyes, throwing the pillow back.

"Tessa I love you but you literally smell.Go take a shower, we're leaving in 15 minutes for school."

I do as he says despite the fact that I am so tired and genuinely don't want too.As I walk past him out of the door I mumble "I don't smell."He scoffs, shaking his head and leads me to the shower.

***

"You look like a you're getting ready to sell books around our neighborhood."Landon says as I put the car in park, after we had entered our college.

"What do you mean Landon?I always look like this."I say, looking my review mirror.Okay,I don't always look like this.I'm wearing a blue cardigan and orange buttoned up dressed.I didn't have clothes so Landon and I went to target because I would rather buy a new closet than go back to that dorm right now.

"I mean what the fuck are you wearing?You haven't worn a cardigan since 3rd grade."

"I just happened to remember that cardigans are really comfortable."

"Yea and all of a sudden you think that colors are fashionable and don't make you want to throw up."

"I've grown out of my emo phase."

"Emo phase?Tessa what the-"He stops in the middle of his sentence and looks at me with a frown."Tessa does this has something to do with Hardin?"

"No,Landon.I'm just trying something new."

"Something new that just happens to look exactly like something Hardin would like on a girl?"I stay silent.I don't know what to say because he's right.Hardin doesn't like girls like me, the dark clothes,the bad attitude and the emotional baggage.I guess Landon takes my silence as confirmation because he continues on."Tessa you don't need Hardin.Your stronger than you will ever know and no guy can dictate that.Go in there not to show him how much of a loser he is but for yourself, to do what you came here to do and prove everyone wrong."

"Okay."

"Really?"

"Yeah."I mutter with a smile.

"Go get them then Young."He smirks.We step out of the car and look at each other with a smile while sliding our sun glasses on.We meet on the other side of the car and hook our arms together.

"Tessa, you still look like a nun."He whispers in my ear with a smile.

"We'll deal with that later."I whisper, smile into his ear.He gently nudges me, causing me to laugh.Despite all the looks we're getting and despite the whispers I'm hearing, being here with my best friends helps me realize I'm doing this for me and only me.

***

"Tessa, you're late."My english lit teacher calls.

"I'm aware."I scoff as I plop down into my sit.

"Well since you're so aware maybe next time try not to be late."

"I'll keep that in mind.No promises though."I smile, sarcastically.The teacher turns away from me as I roll my eyes and turn my head only to find Hardin looking down at me with wide eyes.

"Tessa?Where have you been?We need to talk and you haven't come home at all."

"You mean home like America?"

"No, like our dorm.You haven't come home and I've been worried about you."

The teacher starts the class."Okay class take out your notebooks and start the assignment on the board.Tessa try to keep up."

"I will."I sarcastically remark, the teacher rolls his eyes at me and continues writing on the board.

"Tessa, why didn't you just come to the door and let me know you were okay?"

"Well 1,I didn't want to walk in on you and your girlfriend's bible thumping and 2 i didn't feel like it."I pull out my notebook and place it on my desk, might as well at least look like I'm doing my work.

"Bible thumping what?Tessa just because we dress conservatively doesn't mean we're have bibles in our cars."

"Do you?"

"What?"

"Do you have a bible in your car?"I challenge with a arch of my brow.

"No.I-I mean my mom does but I don't so.I don't know why is that important.We're talking about the fact that you just disappeared for 3 days."

"We're not talking about this."

"What?Tessa-"

"We're not talking about this."I deadpan.He huffs and sits back into his chair.We continue the rest of the class with doing our work and remaining in silence.

***

"Tessa!Wait!"Hardin calls from behind me.

I whip around to face him."What do you want?"

"Why are you so angry?I don't get why you're so mad, you knew I had a girlfriend before.Nothing is going on between us Tessa ,I have a girlfriend."

"Whatever Hardin.I'll be back in the dorm tonight.Just stay away from me or I will ruin you."I turn away from him and feeling something on my face, something...wet.

I touch my face and realize,I'm crying.