All There Is

Chapter 11-Tessa

          I cup my face and my hands and sigh into them, frustrated with his question.I'm frustrated with this entire situation in general.I'm frustrated with the fact that Hardin thinks that he can just ask me these type of question, like I owe him a explanation.I'm frustrated that Trevor thinks that because I rejected him he can pull all this shit.I don't know what I'm doing right now.

I kind of dug myself a whole,I led him on acting like I needed him when I really don't.I just needed him in that moment.A moment of weakness,anyone would want to be held in those big strong British arms.He knows some shit about me already, thanks to Landon who will be getting an earful from me but right now I have to deal with the green-eyed boy sitting before me.

"You know those moments in our lives that seems to define us?"He nods his head clearly not understanding where I'm heading with this."Those moments that we keep going back too."He nods his head again, understanding the words I'm saying a little more.

"This moment was something that did define me, in the most negative way humanly possible."I let out a bitter laugh.

"Tessa, you're perfect."

"But I'm not Hardin.I'm really not and It's not your job to make me feel perfect.It's not your job to make me feel anything."I say, my tone exhausted.

"I just want you to open up to me okay?I understand how you feel and I just want to help you.Tessa I-"

"Stop!"I stand up and look back down at him.

"You don't even know what I was going to say."He stands up along with me.

"Yes I do.Your gonna say some bullshit thing about how you feel something for me when you shouldn't Hardin.I met you yesterday and you have a girlfriend."

"Yea one I don't love Tessa."

"And you love me?How could you ever love me Hardin?We just met."

"Tessa I never said I love you."He sighs running his fingers through his air."I don't know what I'm doing Tessa.I have a girlfriend, your right and we have only known each other for a day.But I can't deny that I feel something for you,I just don't know what it is yet."

I feel calmer after his revelation and decide to take my seat back next to him."I understand what you mean, about you not understanding what you feel because truthfully I don't either and that's why I can't open up to you Hardin.I don't know you."

"But what do you think this connection or whatever between us ,is really about?"He asks.I don't really know,I mean the second I saw him I knew he was sexy.Then the second we kissed, he got all clingy, then it hits me.Like a big fat fucking truck of reality check and ideas.

"Sex."

"What?"His voice cracks and his eyes snap toward me, wide and shocked.

"Sex.Sexual tension that's what we have Hardin."I smile at him."I think I know how to handle it."The second the words leave my mouth.I take in a breathe and jump on Hardin with a  kiss.I kiss him back and he runs his fingers through my hair.

"What do you want to do?"He mumbles against my lips.I tilt my head to lean down and kiss his neck.

"Let's just kiss for a minute."I mumble against his neck.We continue doing that, kissing that is and he hasn't made a single move to touch me at all.Just how respectable is this guy?

I pull away and look at him with my eyes narrowed."You do know you can touch me right?"

"What?"

"Touch me.You know like my body?"

"Why would I do that?"He asks, confused.I move off of him and rub my temples.

"Just how in-sexually experienced are you?"I ask with a laugh.

"I mean I have only ever kissed really."He shrugs, he looks very uncomfortable and I have a good idea how to set him at ease.

"Have you ever touched a woman?A real one."I say, slowly taking off his shirt that I still have one from last night leaving my chest completely naked.Hardin's eyes pop out of his head and I realize I have the desired affect on him."Have you ever seen a women's chest before?"

"N-No."He stutters.I lick my lips with a smile.

"You seem tense Hardin, really tense."I straddle him again, rubbing his broad shoulders."Let me help you with that."

"How would you do that?"

"Like this baby."I whisper in his ear, licking his ear lobe.I move to his neck and like a trail all the way down to his popping erection."Don't have to touch it."I say,Hardin gulps.I take off his boxer.I don't waste anytime teasing the poor guy and take his length into my mouth.I lick him from the tip, up and down.

"Tess.What-What are you doing?"

I gasp, popping my head up looking at him."It's called sucking dick Hardin.Now I'm gonna continue..."I go back down on him taking him in like I did before, but this time I rub his balls with it.

"Oh my god.That feels...amazing."I do it a little more but this time,I make eye contact with him and immediately I feel him jerk inside my mouth and his come spurt down my throat.I instinctively swallow.

I lean my head up and sigh with a smile on my face.I lick my lips, wiping off the excess come on my lips.He pulls me up and forces me to lay my head on his chest.After a few moments of silence and cuddling,Hardin breaks said silence."How did you know how to do that so well?"He whispers into my hair.

"You want the honest truth?"

"Of course."He kisses my neck, brining my closer to him.

I sit up tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.His eyes are not on my face but on my boobs.I cover up my chest and Hardin follows and covers his eyes."Shit Tess.I'm sorry."

"Hardin.Hardin."He still has not made a move to move his hands."Ugh.Hardin."I shake his arms trying to pull his hands away.

"It's fine baby."I reach my hand out and caress his cheek."I just sucked your dick, you can look at my boobs."I pause for a moment."Can I have your hoodie?"

"Yea.Yea of course Tessa."He pulls his hoodie off and hands it to me.I slide his hoodie on and now surprise it is one representing our university.He is such a dork but it's kind of a turn on.The fact that he is so innocent and cute, it really does turn me on.

"So then how do you know how to do...that...so well?"

"Sucking dick?"

"Yea that."He gulps which makes me laugh at his innocence.

"Okay well when I was in 8th grade, we had just done a sexual education class at school.Landon and I we're very curious so we had stolen some of the objects they used to demonstrate for us.So we stole a bunch of dildos and brought them back to my house.We practiced with them, licked them, did a lot of things on them and it was good practice.Plus I've done it on boys before."The last sentence makes him shift uncomfortably but I don't really respond to it.I can't really help him about that one because it happens and he asked so I don't really know what to say.

"Do you want me to do something for you?"He breaks the silence, his voice small and shy.

"It's fine."I smile at him.I straddle him again and lean to whisper in his ear."However we can do what just happened again if you would like." 

"I would like that."He laughs against my neck.

"Yea?"I giggle.

"Yea."He laughs with me.We begin kissing but are almost immediately interrupted by someone barging through the door.

"Hardin!"She yells and he looks back at her.

"Steph?"He asks.

"Hey they're baby.Mind telling me who this is."She scoffs and I look back at Hardin and his face is pale as hell.Baby?Why did she call him baby?

Oh.My.God.His girlfriend is here and I'm straddling his lap in underwear wearing his hoodie.