To Break

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“Rainy!”

I jumped at the sound of my name being called.

“What’s taking you so long?” The same voice asked from somewhere outside the dingy, brick cubicle. The smell of salt water was in the air, mixed with seaweed and other mysterious things found in the river.

“Uh, nothing,” I said, not knowing how to explain. Instead, I came out of the toilet to where Reece was waiting for me; board shorts on, shirt off.

A frown creased his eyebrows immediately. “Why aren’t you in your bathers?” He asked, confused.

“Um…” I trailed, reaching to fiddle with the end of my plait before remembering I had my hair up. My hand was back beside me the next moment.

“Oh. Is it something that I don’t want to know?” He asked, visibly cringing.

“God no!” I exclaimed, clapping a hand over my mouth. My hand muffled the laughter at the red in his cheeks. He dropped his eyes before giving me the finger. I bit my lip to silence myself before explaining.

“No, it’s not… that…You know how I got bathers off Quinn so that I didn’t have to go home first?” I asked. He nodded, dark eyes still to the sand beneath our feet. “Well it’s a bikini.”

Reece lifted his eyes to meet mine, one of his eyebrows raised. “And?”

Didn’t he know me at all?

“And,” I said with exasperation. “I don’t wear bikinis. You know what I’m like.”

He nodded. Of course he knew. It was hard not to. It was the same reason I never wore tight fitting dresses or really short shorts. I hated my body.

“Princess, it’s just me,” he said, stepping towards me and taking my hand. “It’s freaking freezing, there’s no one around except me and you know I’m not going to judge you. Not that there is anything to judge…” He trailed, flashing me his most convincing smile.

“But-“ I started to say, my face drooped into a pout.

“But nothing. I want to swim,” Reece whined, and then put his hands together in a begging gesture. “Please?”

I looked down at the red bag Quinn had given me and sighed. “Fine. I’ll be out in a minute.”

His face brightened into a huge grin, stretching across his entire face. “Thank you!”

I went back into the cubicle and got out the two pieces of forest-patterned material. They were really pretty, but-

No, I stopped myself. I wasn’t going to argue this. I really wanted to swim as well. I could always run straight to the water and dive in if I felt so uncomfortable. That way he couldn’t see any of the things I hated most.

I slipped out of my sweats and into the bathers, adjusting them for a few minutes until I was ready. I took a deep breath and unlocked the door. Swinging the bag over my shoulder, I stepped out, eyes glued to the ground.

Reece’s eyes were on me, I knew that, but I just walked until I saw his feet in front of me. “Shall we? It’s cold,” I said, shivering for emphasis.

“Oh, uh… Yeah,” he stumbled.

Huh?

Reece was the most well-spoken, confident person I knew. I had never heard him screw up a sentence. Especially not one so basic that kindergarteners could say it better. To say I was confused would be a large understatement.