D I S C O N N E C T E D
I feel disconnected with the rest of the world; With my family, friends and if I dare say,
myself.
I miss me. I miss happy me. I miss optimistic me. I miss confident me.
The disconnection I feel has slowy created self loathing.
This disconnection has given way to all the negative feelings and thoughts I've been trying to suppress and ignore.
This disconnection makes me feel like an empty fucking shell.
I feel dead despite being always surrounded by people.
I miss the fire inside of me.The mindset of not giving up. This time I feel like giving up on myself. I want to put up a fight. Find myself again. I really do.
I cannot. I do not find the courage to do so.
But I'd like to say that I've at least tried. I've tried to find the things I love and experience them. But I realised that I do not enjoy them anymore.
I feel the breeze on my face without really enjoying it.
I laugh without understanding why.
I sit with the people I love trying hard to enjoy the moment but I miserably fail.
I am just there.
Empty
Broken
But still smiling.
