"UNEXPECTED DESIRE" SPENCER REID X READER CM FIC

PART 17 "Caring for each other"

                 You remembered the occasion when you'd been really into this guy in your highschool class, &  you'd seen him making out with Alexa (your best friend at the time) after having asked you out. You were devastated, not even your Mom could get you to talk. Before you could even utter a word about the incident, it took weeks on end. To believe it all happened in this spot you brought Reid too. For some odd reason you felt the impulse to test your emotions and see if being here with Reid would change the way you felt about this spot. 

When he noticed the tears streaming down your face he rushed to your rescue. 

Reid-"are you ok, for a few minutes now I've noticed you were being silent but at first I thought you had been taking in nature...but now I realized something more must be going on?"* He nervously placed his hand on your gentle arm *

Y/N-"I guess, I just-idk? My mind just floated to an unpleasant memory from when I last came here"

Reid-" I know you haven't known me all that long... but, you know you can talk to me about whatever, whenever you want...Right?" 

*His eyes gently fixed upon yours*

(His heart instantly feeling an immense amount of guilt for not having detected your emotions sooner.)

Y/N-" thanks, ok..well..I was in 11th grade & I had a really bad crush on this guy in my class. For weeks we'd been flirting with each other, & one day he asked me out and said to meet him at the beach...so I decided to arrive early & sketch a while to pass time...when I sat down I heard his voice & thought he also wanted to do the same...so I walked over to where I heard the voice-&- spotted him making out with my best friend, Alexa...I was devastated. Prior to him asking me out, Alexa had expressed to me that she had no intentions of going out with him & well..she didn't mind us dating " *Your eyes filled with tears. Disappointment is all you felt thinking back about your friend that now remained in the past..like the not so distant memory of this spot you sat in. It didn't take long for you to subtly inch closer to Reid*

*In turn he did the same, now wrapping his lengthy arms around your petite body.* 

Reid-"I'm so sorry about that..I had no idea.."

Y/N-" It's fine.. the worst part about the whole thing is, is that Alexa had planned the entire thing. A prank! Was all it was for her! I'm not a joke..but they both made me feel like one after telling the entire school. She had already been dating him in secret.. probably since the beginning of the year...after that..I cut her out of my life & discontinued talking to her." 

*You wiped a tear from your cheek and looked downwards*

Reid-" I would never EVER HURT YOU..especially not like that...look-with me that would never happen...I know.. we're not boyfriend & girlfriend or anything... yet...but I really like you. I hate seeing you sad because of some so called friend & a jerk who never deserved you to begin with." *His eyes focused on her quivering lips*

Y/N-" I know I technically barely know you..even though.. I feel like we've hung out a million times but..I have a feeling you wouldn't. No I know you wouldn't.." *now you looked faced up at him*

Reid-"ya know...The last time I felt so close to someone like I do with you..was when.."

*He choked on the very words, he thought he'd never be able to say after Maeve.*

Y/N-" Are you ok?"

*You furrowed your brows in an attempt to appear understanding/comprehensive.* 

After all you were genuinely interested in getting to know the real Spencer Reid. It's not as if he had some sort of artificial attitude but he wasn't exactly easy to squeeze information out of. In this case you couldn't blame him, for you had no idea what words were about to come spilling out of his precious mouth.

Reid-"nevermind--- I shouldn't bring it up." *his eyes welling up, in the most discreet way* Perhaps he was too angry to let himself feel the pain of what he had been through? Maybe he was afraid to let go? Maybe telling Y/N would ease the growing pain in his fragile heart? Or would it just give him another reason to push her away, no matter how much he wanted to get closer?

Y/N-" You can talk to me too, I don't want you to just worry only about me & forget about you. I want to know what you're clearly hurting about & carry the wait with you." *A side smile  that signaled the encouragement & urgency of your words came across your slightly, agitated face.

Your eyes were now recovering from the stress of the moment, but still hadn't fully gone back to their beautiful normal selves.*

Reid-" Y/N I really appreciate it... I've never told anyone else about this except for the team….. several months ago I'd been looking for a solution to some intense headaches, they'd been affecting my vision & focus. At that point I'd had enough of it….so I found this brilliant Dr.--her name was Maeve Donavon...she'd been studying things in reference to my situation….over the course of our contact we developed feelings...we hadn't met each other yet..we did everything over the phone..for a while the team had been suspicious of my long mysterious phone calls..but sooner or later they found out…..shortly after that-- Maeve & I agreed to meet in person at a restaurant..but we couldn't...turns out she had a stalker--& they'd been watching us the entire time. So we couldn't meet face to face that day...next thing I knew she wasn't answering her phone..