𝖈𝖔𝖗𝖕𝖘𝖊 𝖍𝖚𝖘𝖇𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝖎𝖒𝖆𝖌𝖎𝖓𝖊𝖘/𝖕𝖗𝖊𝖋𝖊𝖗𝖊𝖓𝖈𝖊𝖘💀🖤

scars

⚠trigger warning so if you get easily triggered don't read. this was a suggestion.⚠

'fat'

'ugly'

'whore'

'hoe'

'slut' 

'go kill yourself'

that's all you heard. the constant name calling, the body shaming, the being judged. you had enough. everyday you sit in your room and cut while you cry. 

your razor became your bestfriend. nobody bothered checking up on you. your only friend was the razor. he understood you better than anybody. 

you had a boyfriend, but he didn't know. this made your mental health worse. you already deal with depression. adam was gone one day and you were scrolling on twitter to see someone mentioned you in a post.  

@randomuser mentioned you in a post @y/t/n: wow you think adam loves you? hahah he told us on live that he wished he had someone else. someone who was happy, not sad. i honestly feel bad for him. he has to deal with your moody ass lol. go kill yourself bitch hahah.

you couldnt take it anymore. you ran to your bathroom and grabbed your bestfriend. you cut up to your forearm. everything then went black.  adam came home. "y/n baby im home!'' he heard the bath water running. he went to the bathroom and dropped to his knees.

 ''Y/N NO WAKE UP PLEASE.'' he shook you until you started waking up. he called 911 because you lost too much blood. adam paced in the waiting room. he couldnt sit down. he couldnt think. all he wants is for you to be alive. the doctor walked to him with a sad look. 

"y/n is ok, she lost a lot of blood so are you willing to donate blood to save her life?'' of course adam said yes. they took his blood and sent him back to the waiting room.

 ''adam?'' he sat up and they took him to where you were. his heart broke into a million pieces. your arms were wrapped up with bandages, tubes sticking in you, it was awful.

 he sat down in the chair beside you. he grabbed your hand and squeezed it. he was crying so much. you squeezed his hand. he looked up and saw you smiling with tears running down your face. he hugged you thankful you were alive. 

"why am i alive. i wasn't supposed to live.'' ''i had to give some blood to save your life. you lost too much and if i didn't give my blood, i would have lost you.''

 you felt a huge wave of guilt wash over you. he did care about you after all. ''im sorry.'' he sat on your hospital bed and hugged you. he let go and looked at you with tears in his eyes. ''don't say sorry. i should have been there when you needed me. im the one who should be saying sorry, not you.''

 you kissed him. you realized that adam needed you. you couldnt leave him. you just couldnt. ''you can leave in 2 days but for now on when something is going on tell me right away ok?'' you agreed. when you were able to leave the hospital, you went back to cutting again.

 but you do talk to adam. he thought he threw away every sharp object in the house, but he realized  you never stopped. he made a promise to his self that no matter what, he was gonna be there. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

this was hard to write. if you are dealing with this and trying to quit, come talk to me.

 i know what its like to feel alone. cutting yourself doesn't do anything but put pain into other people who love you. 

i may not know what you deal with, but know that i care and that i do love you. im here for you if you need help. 

stay safe my loves, take care of yourself please💕