A Holly, Jolly Crisis

Chapter 12

Christmas Eve was fairly typical in your house.

Christmas Day was the main event; you usually spent this at your grandma's house. All your aunts, uncles and cousins would gather, and you'd spend the day drinking mimosas and unwrapping gifts by the fireplace.

There was tons of cooking to do, so your mom usually went over the night before to help. Usually you, your dad and Sara watched Christmas movies at home but this year, Sara was spending Christmas Eve at Yoongi's. Your dad had volunteered to help your mom cook, which left you alone in the house for the evening.

You'd been invited to your grandma's place, of course, but it was a halfhearted invitation, and you knew it. Your grandma was nothing if not a perfectionist and had zero patience for your brand of burnt toast. Besides, someone needed to make sure the Christmas lights were turned on.

In this way, you found yourself alone on Christmas Eve. Weirdly, this didn't upset you at all. Wrapping yourself in your fuzziest blanket, you made yourself a cup of hot chocolate and settled in to watch the Grinch. Everyone else in your family refused to watch with you because you could quote every line by heart – and often did.

You tried not to think about Hoseok but kept coming up short. Every few minutes, a memory would drift to the surface and you'd wonder if he'd read your screenplay yet, if he'd understood what you'd meant and if he had any thoughts.

Frown deepening, you turned up the volume and tried to drown out your thoughts. It was Christmas Eve, and you had the entire place to yourself. You'd be damned if you let Hoseok –

A knock sounded at your front door.

Pressing pause, you sat up and listened. Someone knocked again and, setting down your mug, you stood to pad down the hall. It was around 7:30 PM, but you weren't expecting either your parents or Sara back until 11:00 PM, which meant it had to be someone else.

Maybe a neighbor. It wouldn't be the first time a strand of lights had come loose from your roof and landed on someone's lawn. Halfway to the door, the person knocked a third time, and you noticed a shadow on your doorstep.

"Coming!" you yelled. In your haste, you'd nearly forgotten about the blanket wrapped around your shoulders. "Hang on!"

Undoing the lock, you opened the front door to find Hoseok before you. He stood on your porch, clutching your papers and looking indignant.

"What is this?" he demanded, thrusting them forward.

You stared at him in alarm. "Um. My new screenplay?"

"Right." Hoseok paused. "Let's start there. This person – Carlos. Is he based on me?"

"I..." Suddenly hesitant, you tugged on the blanket. "A little. Maybe."

"Okay. And his best friend – Raya," Hoseok said. "Who's that?"

Awkward, you shifted your weight to your other foot.

This was what you'd intended by giving him the screenplay. You'd wanted Hoseok to understand how deeply you felt about him, how much you'd missed having him in your life. Hoseok had always been a superhero to you, even if he didn't know it.

"She's..." Helpless, you looked at Hoseok. "She's Carlos' best friend."

Hoseok stared at you a moment. "Alright." Looking down, he flipped through pages until he found the one he sought. A page scrawled with your handwriting. "And what about this?" Hoseok demanded, turning it around. "What's this?"

Slightly cross-eyed, you read your own writing.

To the only person who's ever seen the real me. Here's how I see you.