Not good enough

CHAPTER 6

ALEX'S POV:
We have to follow a strict low calories meal plan. it's absurd, but at least we're eating something. I really am trying to get better, because I don't want to spend the rest of my life in a hospital, trying to survive.
- Hello- I see Leo standing on my door. I'm not sure why.
- Hi-
- I'm sorry to bother... just checking in- he says.
- Oh not, it's okay... it's nice to talk to someone here- I tell him
- I know... sometimes it can feel so lonely- he comes in. - Come on, I'll show you around-
we walk through the hallways of the hospital, I listen carefully to his explanation about every single floor and what's on it. He seems really nice, I feel like we'll be great friends.
- And that's kind of it... now we need to go to lunch-
we start walking to the table, and we sit down.
- Enjoy your meals guys!- a nurse puts down some food on the table, and leaves.
Every one starts picking up something from the plate and eating. Everyone but Leo and me.
- Aren't you going to pick something ?- I ask him.
- Aren't you ?- he fights back.
I smile at him, and look back.
there's chicken, some potatoes, and some salad.
Go for the salad. I take a small amount of it and place it in my plate.
- See... your turn- I tell him.
He curses me with his look. I can feel it. So I laugh.
He takes a small piece of chicken.
- Happy ?-
I nod.
We all start eating, some of them talk about how long they've been here, and how they got here.
- How do you do it ?- Mario asks.
- What ?-
- Throw up... I've tried so many times that I don't really know why I can't do it- he tells me.
- I don't know... I just put my fingers all the way back and... well-.
- How lucky- he laughs.
We continue eating, and once everyone is done, we head back to our rooms.
- Good night- Leo says.
- Bye- I tell him as I watch him disappear.
I now lie in bed, and close my eyes

*play paradise by coldplay*

- Come on Al! We can make it- he laughs.
He holds my hand, and lifts me in the air.
- I can't Harry! - I tell him.
- Just hold me, you'll be save with me baby !-
he looks me in the eyes, and gives me a soft smile.
- At the count of three, we start running okay ?- he asks
- I'm not ready !- i laugh louder
- 1...2... and...3, LET'S GO !- He starts running while holding my hand.
We keep running towards the water, but I stop before even touching it.
- I can't!- I scream with my hands covering up my face.
- Hey babe... look at me- he tells me. - There's nothing to be afraid of, I'll hold your hand... you're safe with me, okay ?-
I take a deep breath and nod.
- Let's try it again okay ?-
we walk back, and he holds my hand.
- Are you okay ?- he asks
- Yes-
- Then come here- he screams. He lifts me from my legs, and places my body on his shoulders, so all I can see is his magnificent ass.
- Harry put me down ! What are you doing ?!- I scream. I can't help but to laugh even harder.
- Let's go !- he screams.
I notice how he starts running towards the water.
- Harry don't you dare...- I tell him.
Seconds later, we're both under water.
I quickly put my head out.
- Harry!_ I laugh.
- It was worth it, wasn't it ?-
- It always is- I tell him
I cross my legs around his waist, and my arms around his neck.
He holds me with his hands. Giving me comfort.
He kisses my lip, and then bites the bottom lip with his teeth.
- I love you Al... don't ever forget that-
- I love you hazz... don't ever forget that- I smile against his lips. And he kisses me again.

I open my eyes, and find myself in the white room I fell asleep in.
what a great dream i had. all the memories of that day made me smile.
i miss him so much...
he makes everything seem like a fucking paradise.

I needed to go to the bathroom, and everything was dark.
I started walking through the hallways trying to find the bathroom.
I walked in, and I heard some noise.
- Are you okay?- I ask to whoever is in there.
I slowly open the door. And I find Leo, sitting on his knees, crying.
*play we'll be fine by luz*

- Hi... can I sit ?- I ask him.
He looks at me.
- I couldn't help it... I had to- he says.
I get closer, to give him a hug.
- It's okay- I whisper.
- I had to... I had to- he keeps saying with a broken voice.
- it's alright, don't worry- I try calming him down.
Minutes later someone gets in, and it turns out to be Doctor Peterson.
- What happened ?- he asks.
He carries Leo on his arms, he's barely awake.
- I don't know... I just found him like this- I panic.
- Was he throwing up?- he asks.
- I... I think so, yeah-
- Okay, go to bed now- he disappears with Leo on his arms.
I make my way back to my room, and lie in bed. But I can't go back to sleep now.
- thank you-
I look in the door, and see Peterson standing there.
- If you hadn't found him... it would've been catastrophic- he says.- so, thank you-
I smile at him.
- We'll sedate him for a couple of days, and we'll put him the tube- he tells me.
I feel so bad for him.
- So, tomorrow you need to be ready by 9:00 am- he tells me while turning around. - Family therapy session.
- Is he...?-
- Yes Alex, he's coming too-
- But, why ?-
he turns around again and sits on my bed.
- They are here, to give their point of view, to talk about how they feel about the disease, and everything that has happened- he tells me in a calmed tone. - You have nothing to worry about.
- Okay...-
he leaves now.
I turn to a side, and close my eyes.
tomorrow's gonna be a long day.