Marvel One-Shots

Christmas Vines (Crack)

Tony was standing in front of the camera. He was swaying his hips to the music.

'All I want for Christmas is You!'

Tony opened a wedding ring box. Inside laid the note.

'JK '

Tony flipped them off. Then he started dancing then ran off.

~~~

Peter looked down at the gift. He was going to wrap a present for Aunt May. It should be easy enough.

Two hours later Tony walked in.

"Call 911!"

Peter's whole body was wrapped in paper. He was struggling and couldn't get out.

~~~

Music was blaring from the speaker. Clint was in a Santa hat and was dancing around.

"I don't want a lot for Christmas"

Clint stopped dead in his track. "Fuck that I want a lot of shit."

~~~

The gifts had just been handed out. The team was listening to Christmas music and sat in a circle. They went to unwrap them. But a green figure broke it.

It was the grinch. Everyone screamed and scattered away.

The grinch laughed evilly. He grabbed all the presents and put them in his sack. Then he took off, cackling like a maniac.

When he was out of the complex he stopped. Slowly his form changed. Loki looked back and started laughing.

~~~

Cheerfully Tony handed out gifts. "Ok, you can open your presents."

Rock music played in the distance as Thor screamed. He tore apart the box. Somehow he ended up with the box on his head. Then he threw it at the wall. In one hand was pop tarts. He screamed at the top of his lungs.

~~~

Bucky looked out the window. He dragged his hand down the cool surface. A sad smile plagued his face.  "Where are you Christmas?"

"I'm right here"  Bucky turned around toward the voice.

"AAAAAAAAHHHHH" Bucky swung his fist and hit the man with a white beard.

He bent over and yanked the hat and beard off.  Sam was out cold on the ground. Sighing Bucky went to get some water.

~~~

"Today we are going to teach you how to decorate for Christmas."

Loki turned around to see Thor struggling. The lights were wrapped around his neck. The God of thunder was trying to talk. But it was muffled.

"Thor you are going to break the Christmas lights!" Loki screamed as he tried to get him unwrapped.

~~~

Clint jokingly said that Steve couldn't do a cartwheel. Smirking Steve got up. He did a cartwheel and ended up crashing into the tree and knocking it over. There was a loud shatter of bulbs.

Steve got up. "Nailed it!"

~~~

Clint threw a piece of popcorn at Natasha. She gave him an angry glare.