I saw him walk away and rode his van...
"I feel guilty because of what I did.." I whisper to myself then I continue to walk inside the building..
I faked my ignorance..I told him that I liked him as a friend even though I know what he is referring to...I feel guilty, but I don't have a choice but to dump him..I don't want anyone to be so close to me...because if they do, they will be hurt so much when I leave them..and it will be hard for me too, to go...
I'm in front of our dorm's door now, i just look at it for a long time..will I be able to open this door if they found out that I'm a girl? That I deceived them all? I have so much thought in my mind and my heart is full of guilt now..
"I think I should just rest for now.." I whisper then I open the door..It's too dark in here because it's already 8:00 in the evening and no one is in here because they all went out..I turn on the lights and my eyes widen when...
"CONGRATS JOEY!!!" they all shouted in chorus...I look at the whole dorm and I saw a sign with a hangul writings.."Chukhahae Joey-ssi" that is written on the tarpaulin...and there are boxes of pizza in the table, there are also fried chicken and sweet and sour pork and jjangmyun..
"You guys..prepare..this..all for..me?"I said in shock..I am really shocked, because I thought they are not here and I didn't expect that they will prepare this for me..
"Yes..and you should thank us for these..A++ for effort.." Jackson oppa said and he put his arms in my shoulder..It's kinda heavy but I feel comfortable and belong whenever they do it..
"Yahhh..why are you so late...We wait for too loong.." Jr. said like he's so irritated but I know that he's just teasing me..
"Congratulations, you just ended your training..now you'll debut soon and perform with us..right JB?" Youngjae said looking at JB oppa..
"Yes..and just want to say sorry for what I did before...and for being cold to you.." JB said looking and smiling at me..
"Joey, you'll be able to perform with us and we will travel around the world when we got the World Tour Concert.." Yugyeom said and then he gave me a short hug..
"You'll be able to debut in maybe a month..congratulations.."Bambam said smiling to me too..
A month? So I'm going to leave them too soon, It'll be a short time for me..I won't be able to talk, laugh, eat with them, enjoy every practice and reach them out after that..Thinking of that makes my heart ache so much..I feel like I don't want to go anymore...
"Joey..you alright?" Mark oppa asked me...That brought me back from thinking..Why? Why are you all so good to me..It'll all be hard for me..to leave you guys..
"De (yes)..I'm just tired.." I answered gloomy..I really didn't feel fine now..Because I came to a realization that I will leave them after a short time..
"Let's eat..Kaja (let's go).." JB oppa shouted..He really loves to eat...I didn't move to my place..I think I should start to take a picture from today onwards..I'll take a picture of every moment and scenes like this while I'm here..
"Joey, let's eat.." Yugyeom asked me to eat..but I feel so sentimental today and I lose my appetite because of thinking such things..
"I'm full..you just eat..I'm going to take a rest.." I said in a a low tone...
I walk in to our room and lay my back...I turn around and saw my wallet there...I keep something inside that because I don't want anyone to see this..I took the picture in my wallet..
A perfect picture of my old self and my three best friends...I'm so fat in that picture and my friends are on my side smiling..I missed those times when they are teasing me for being so fat but praising me for being a smart student in our college..I keep this picture so that I won't forget my old self and always look where I came from...that's what my parents taught me...I just look at that picture until I fell asleep...
