"You want attention?", I try to fill in.
"Not just attention, it's more than that"
"You sound like you just want at-"
"You", she cuts me off. "I don't only want attention, I want you"
Fuck me, it definitely feels better when she says it sober.
...
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"Long time girly", Charlie greets me with the biggest smile.
On the contrary to popular belief, I am not a bitch.
I am actually a really nice person, even if I'm the only one who thinks that.
At the beginning of Charlie and Luca's relationship, I was anything but nice to her. I was the absolute worst actually. But she never responded negatively back to me.
It took a long time, and a sit down from Luca, for me to realize that I should not be angry at this girl. It is not her fault that Luca chooses her over me.
So instead of continuing to be irrationally angry at her, I decided to get to know her. And now I can see why Luca is so smitten.
She is just too pure for this world.
"Tell me about it", I respond, trying to match the smile on her face.
Gosh, she is so beautiful. It's almost unbelievable.
"I'm so glad you finally found the time to hang out with me", she teases me.
"I missed you so much", I admit to her with a pout on my face.
"Aww, I missed you too babe", she pulls me into a hug.
"Are you looking for anything specifically?", I ask as we both enter the mall.
"Nah, I don't have any money", she and I both laugh because I don't have any money either.
"Me either but we should still try on everything though", I suggest while pulling her into the Forever 21.
For the next two hours or so we both walk around the mall trying on clothes we wish we could buy until hunger struck.
"Have you been crying?", Charlie ask me, I guess she got tired of waiting on me to bring it up.
"No, why?"
"Your face looks a little puffy", she points out.
I haven't been crying but I have been having trouble sleep. I haven't seen him in four days now, my mind won't allow me to rest. We facetime and text often but I like seeing him in person way more. Plus my brother has been home all four days so it's not like he's busy.
"It's nothing, I haven't been getting much sleep. There is this new show what I'm obsessed with so I have been bingeing it.", I tell her a half-truth.
"What show?", she keeps on meddling.
"Um", I trail off when I catch a glimpse of someone who looks like him. "Just some show", I try but I cannot stop my eyes from following the Jackson look-alike, I miss him so much. "About weddings", I finally answer.
"Is that Jackson?", Charlie follows my gaze.
"I don't know, let's go check", I eagerly rush after the potential stranger without her response.
He is about to walk into the Cartier store, it's definitely Jackson.
"Jackson", I lightly touch the stranger's shoulder in hopes they turn around.
"Veronica", he turns around, in shock it seems.
Oh gosh, I wasn't aware of how much I missed his presents. Just with the smile on his face, I feel as everything has become alright with the world again.
"Hey Charlie", he greets her with a side hug.
After being ignored for days I imagined that I would be angry or at least upset the next time I see him but I can't seem to manage any other emotion but delight.
I didn't even notice but over the last four days that I have been forced to avoid contact with him, I was yearning for him. I thought I was burning in anger but it was so much more.
I don't think I have experienced such intense feelings from just one look before. Long gone are the butterflies and here comes the hunger.
"Jackson", I say again with a smile on my face that of a person who is about to have their cake, and eat it too.
