Undercover | a. hotchner |

Chapter 26

Today was Sean's funeral, everything was happening so fast for Aaron. He had just learned of his brother's death yesterday.

Early this morning Aaron drove over to Hayley's to get Jack. Hayley was surprisingly understanding to why Aaron wanted Jack to go.

Even though Jack had only met him once or twice, he was old enough to know who Sean was to him.

By the time I woke up Aaron was sitting on the side of the bed with his head in his hands. I didn't know how long he had been sitting there but clearly he was coming to terms with the death of his brother.

I slowly sat up and made my way over to him, when he felt the bed dip he looked over at me and leaned his head into my chest. "Okay baby", I said when he completely rested into my body.

I heard feet patter down the hardwood floor and Jack came up to the door. "Go get dressed buddy."

He nodded and went back to his room. Aaron had picked out clothes for him this morning so he knew what to wear.

____

I walked out of the bathroom after applying my makeup. He was still sitting there but now in his black suit.

I lifted him up to finish getting ready, grabbing the black tie from his closet. I wrapped it around his neck, finishing his outfit.

I walked down the hallway to Jack's room and he was playing with Legos on the floor. "Buddy we gotta go", he put the toys away and grabbed my hand.

I went back to the bedroom. Aaron was leaning against the wall. He was internalizing the pain, he didn't wanna seem weak.

I grabbed his hand and we went to the car.

I got into the driver's seat, heading to the viewing. The car ride was almost completely silent. The only sound was Jack trying to talk to Aaron.

When we arrived we went inside of the building and found the team waiting in the lobby. They were gathered around, talking quietly when they saw us.

"I'm so sorry", Rossi put his hand on his shoulder. The others thought it'd be best to stay quiet during this time.

They all wanted to be there for Aaron and the best they could do was show up. Letting him know that they were there for support.

I saw Aaron look down the aisle, he stared at the casket.

He turned to face me, "Y/n I can't--."

I put my hand into his, "Baby, yes you can." I whispered in his ear. I walked to the end of the aisle with Jack in my arms.

It was an open casket and I saw Sean's pale face. Once Aaron saw him he finally broke down. He was whispering 'I'm sorry' consistently, blaming himself for not being there for him. With the damn broken, he let go, they flowed down his face like he'd never cried before.

He reached his hand out and touched his hand before walking away. I brought Jack up with me, he was still in my arms so he could see.

He faced me, "Is that my uncle Sean."

"Yeah sweetie."

Jack reached out and touched his hand before quickly pulling his hand back, "Why is he cold?"

His words hit home for me.

I was on my way home, I just got off the school bus. I walked inside my front door, "Mom I'm home." I went into the kitchen saying hi.

"How was school?"

"Fine", she chuckled as I walked out running up the stairs. My answer was always the same but she asked anyway in case my answer was different.

I dropped my back on the floor next to my door and I plopped down on my bed. I changed to some leggings, a tank top, and running shoes.

I always went on a run after school at the park a few minutes away. I jogged out the front door and towards the park. I stopped, turned on some music and started running again.

Setting a pace I went down the trail, I took my time. The trail led to the woods, I had run it so many times the route was practically burned into my brain.

This time as I was passing the lake I saw something in the mud next to the water. It wasn't there the day before or the day before that. It was larger than an animal, and too shaped to be a clump of rocks together.

I went down to the object and saw hair and a hand buried under a layer of mud. I pulled out my phone and called the police.

Despite my mind telling me to wait for the cops I went against my thoughts and reached down, flipping over the body.

My heart sank, and I had a sudden wave of panic. I rested my fingers against her neck trying to feel for a pulse. Her heart wasn't beating, her skin was ice cold. The last time I saw her she was going with her friends on a trip for the weekend.

The cops arrived on the scene and processed everything. They took my fingerprints to separate from any other prints they might have found on her body.

It was my sister.

"Y/n", I was taken out of my thoughts by Jack. He placed a hand on my face, wiping the tears I didn't know were spilling.

I walked away from the body going to sit next to Aaron in one of the pews. Silently we said our goodbyes and we left.

We got into our cars and went along with the procession. I saw them take the casket and place it in the hearse. It pulled out first and we all followed behind, everything felt like a dream. My heart ached for Aaron.

When we got to the funeral Morgan, Aaron, Rossi, Anderson, and a few others carried it to the lowering device.

They surrounded it saying some final words.

"We know that the lord is welcoming and opening his arms to Sean right now."

God I hoped so... he shouldn't have gone so soon.

"Now if the family would like to say some words."

Aaron was the only family Sean had left. Their dad died when Aaron was in high school from cancer. Their mom passed when Aaron joined the academy.

I held Jack close as Aaron stood up and walked in front of everyone, "I would just like to say thank you to the people that took the time to be here. Uh..." He took a moment to collect his thoughts.

"I- Sean had such a good heart, he had his struggles but when he overcame them.. I was so proud of him. Things weren't so easy for us as kids but I always tried my best to help and protect him. Sean became his own person and faced his fears. I didn't think I was going to be losing my brother so soon but I really hope that he's in a better place. No pain, no pressure, just bliss."

Aaron walked away, no one else was saying anything so I walked up front.

"I met Sean a few times, he was a good person. He was someone that tried his best to find his place in the world and eventually he found it. He was happy, finally finding his role in all of this. Sean had a decent sense of humor, it matched with mine pretty well. I would definitely say that he was my friend. My heart goes out to him in hopes he'll be alright."

I didn't have anything else to say; when I walked back Aaron grabbed my hand, holding it tightly and never letting it go.

That didn't stop the way he was acting, it was like he was just a shell, a ghost.

As the funeral finished up we all walked back to our cars, all going our separate ways.

We got home, Jack took a bath and I put him to bed. Aaron and I took a quick shower and went to the kitchen.

He grabbed the bottle of scotch and poured himself a glass. When he finished it he got another.

I cut him off at his fourth drink, I understood the need to drink but I also knew that it was going to do him Jack shit.

"Lets go to bed", he was a little tipsy and he followed me into the bedroom.

The alcohol numbed his pain a bit. He went to sleep easily, with my arms wrapped around him and his head in my chest.