Suicidal

Chapter 5: Harry's POV

I walk downstairs, dressed like I was when I was still in One Direction.
"Wow, Harry. I didn't think you would actually end up looking like an actual human when you go to the restaurant." Zayn says.
"Harry, you're so fat and ugly. Why do you even try to look good anymore?" Louis says.
"W-what do you mean?" I ask Zayn.
"Oh you just look ugly as hell normally, I didn't think your outfit would look good. Not that your ugly face hasn't changed with it, sadly." He replies.
As soon as we get to the restaurant, they already start being mean to me.
"So Harry, how's your life?" Louis asks, trying not to laugh.
"Like he has one," I hear Niall whisper to him.
"Terrible. I hate myself and everyone else in this world hates me. You're right Louis, I should kill myself. If only AJ wouldn't be watching my every move. Excuse me." I tell everyone at the table, walking away. I need to go to the bathroom, so maybe I can try to kill myself.
"Harry, where are you going?" AJ asks, grabbing my hand.
"I have to go to the loo." I say quickly.
"Yeah sure, Harry. We all know you 'just wanna kill yourself,' quit lying, manwhore." Usually AJ jumps to my defence but now she's quiet.
"Is that true, Harry?" She whispers silently. I nod my head yes.
"I knew you were going to do this to him! You make him feel so bad, then you expect me to want to hang out with you? That's pathetic. You really think I want to hang out with a bunch of ARSEHOLES who insult my little cupcake and tell him to die? Well you're all WRONG!" AJ says then pulls me out.
"I'm sorry, Harry. I didn't know..."
"It's fine, I'm fine." Lies. All lies. I knew she knew they would do this. I completely AM NOT fine. I need to die now. I wish someone could just kill me. When we get home, I cuddle with AJ for about 40 minutes before I fall asleep. I hear her crying in her sleep. Probably about me. I'm just a burden to her anyway. I sneak into the bathroom and start cutting myself. I drag the razor across my skin and I feel the sensation of it cutting through. It's almost 5 AM by the time I'm done.
"Harry? Harry where are you? HARRY?!" I hear AJ's worried voice. She knocks on the door.
"ARE YOU IN THERE???! HARRY PLEASE OPEN UP!" She sounds desperate.
"HARRY PLEASE!!?" I clean myself up and unlock the door.
"HARRY!" AJ grabs me and pulls me closer to her.
"I was so scared......" She whispers.
"Come on, let's just eat now." She continues with a normal voice.
"I'm not hungry." She shakes her head.
"Harry. You need to eat." She says.
"I'M NOT HUNGRY!" I'm already this fat, ugly mess.
"Harry please."
"NO! I'M DONE WITH YOU TRYING TO MAKE ME UNAPPEALING TO ANY HUMAN BEING!" I shout.
"Harry, you're so skinny. Please just eat something."
"NO AND I HATE YOU FOR THIS!" I don't mean it of course, but I'm so mad that she's trying to make me fat. Well, fatter than I already am. I run into our bedroom and slam the door.
"HARRY! Please open up! I'm not trying to make you fat, you're just so skinny, you need to gain a little weight." AJ says.
"NO! STOP TRYING TO RUIN MY LIFE! I KNOW ONE DIRECTION HIRED YOU TO MAKE ME FATTER AND BREAK MY HEART AND HUMILIATE ME!"
"Harry please. PLEASE OPEN THE DOOR. Harry please don't argue with me."
"Stop it. I'm killing myself tonight." Well, I'm considering it.
"What-no..... Harry then please let me in. PLEASE! Just so I can say one last goodbye....." She was sobbing.
"No I'm never speaking to you again." I tell her.
"HARRY PLEASE!!! DON'T KILL YOURSELF!!! I LOVE YOU!!!" AJ sobs. She finally unlocks the door and finds me crying on the bed.
"Harry..... It's okay. Just let it all out." I look at her with an angry expression on my face.
"Please don't leave me, Harry. And please, at least say one last word to me. I don't want your last words to me to be an argument."
"Harry please. Please say something." She hugs me tightly and I sort of cuddle up to her for a second but then I separate myself from her.
"Harry?" She says the next morning.
"What?"
"Oh good! You didn't kill yourself! I knew you would have at least told me goodbye! I knew you didn't hate me!" AJ says.