Begin [Ponyboy Curtis]

Are You?

POSSIBLE TRIGGER WARNINGS: Misogyny

Playlist: Self Esteem - The Offspring

I took a deep breath, looking at myself in front of the bathroom mirror. For the first time in a while, I took the time to do my makeup. I loved doing it back home, but it became a nuisance once I moved. I made small wings from the corners of my eyes with dark eyeliner and coated my lashes in thick mascara. I knew It would be running down my face by the end of the night, but it felt like the right occasion.

Standing in front of my closet, picking through my clothes, I thought through every bad thing that could happen from what I was wearing. Obviously, I'm not wearing a dress or a skirt. I considered a pair of overalls until I realized someone might use the straps as handles. That thought prompted me to put my hair in two messy buns, making it harder to grab it from a distance. I settled for a black tank top and a pair of jeans. It was basic, and not "dressed up" as the boys suggested, but it felt safe. I paired it all with some boots I've always considered too "biker like" to look good on me.

I walked down the steps on my toes, hoping it would keep my boots from sounding too loud. A small wisp of smoke drifted from the kitchen into the living room, making me crave a cigarette.

"I'm heading over to a friend's house," I leaned into the door frame just quick enough to see my dad leaning over the sink, straining some noodles.

"Okay. Love you, honey. Call if you're out too late."

"Will do, love you too," I made my way to the coat rack, grabbing a jean jacket and leaving before him or Stacey could catch a glimpse of me. I looked questionable, to say the least.

The sky was almost bright with the stars and a full moon. I shoved my hands into the jacket pockets and practically jogged to Ponyboy's house. I vaguely remembered Ponyboy telling me that he was in track and that when they practiced in the spring or the fall they'd have to be careful not to get too cold before their runs or it would kill their times. I understood that more then than ever, it felt like that walk took me forever.

Every light in the Curtis house was on and emitting a bright yellow hue into the street. I cursed myself softly for not smoking on my way to the house, but I craved the warmth inside their walls too much to stop for a cigarette. As soon as I stepped inside I took my jacket off and tossed it on the arm of the couch. I honestly might have been warmer without that thing clinging to the chill created by every breeze.

"Hey! It's Dorthy!" Two-bit yelled, already on what looked like his fourth beer.

Different greetings barked out at me from around the house.

"What's up, guys?" I answered back.

"Woah, kiddo," Dally shoved me harder than I think he meant to, "I like your eye shit." He too was buzzed, drinking something clear in a glass cup.

"Thanks, Dal," I smiled at him. I guess our run-in with the socs made me okay in his book because he didn't try to nag me out of going.

I pushed my way deeper into the house, finding Ponyboy in the dining room next to the piano watching Steve, Johnny, and Sodapop play a game of cards.

"Hey," he smiled at me, "nice makeup."

"Thanks," I stood next to him and looked at the pictures on the piano. I found one of his whole family, parents included. They all shared the same features as their mom and dad, the most matched family I'd ever seen, "you drinking?"

"Darry won't let me. You're fifteen though so I'm sure you can get away with it."

"Nah," I shrugged, glad to have a reason not to drink, "I'll just have a smoke with you later."