Such An Actress [h.s]

second

Long one. -H

After the encore and Harry and I's ritual high five we make our way to the green room to meet with the boys' family and friends.

This was their last show as One Direction.

The fans don't know this but One Direction is not just going on an eighteen month hiatus, they're taking a break to figure themselves out.

I think it's for the best.

All the boys have grown up and are going in different directions when it comes to music. They need time to just figure themselves out.

I'm just glad I still have a job.

Harry is contemplating solo music. He doesn't think he'll be good enough without the band but I have convinced him otherwise. You'd think with how loyal his fans are that he would be a little more confident in his music.

We all walk into the green room and I'm instantly greeted by the arms of Anne engulfing me in the biggest hug.

"Katie, oh I've missed you so much!" Anne exclaims

"What am I chopped liver?" I hear Harry from behind me.

Anne then pulls away and goes to hug Harry, "You're never chopped liver my boy of course I missed you too"

"Katie!" I hear someone call my name and turn around.

"Mum?!" I say confused as I see my mum rushing towards me. She was supposed to be back home and she said she couldn't make it.

"Katie, darling I've missed you so much!" she says hugging me like I'm about to vanish.

I pull back making sure this is really happening, "What are you doing here I thought you couldn't make it?" I ask with a smile on my face.

"The boy and I thought it would be nice to surprise you" she says pointing to Harry who's just standing there smiling looking at us.

"You- how... How did you get this past me?" I ask because I can always smell out surprises from a mile away. You can't get anything past me. Well I guess this is the one exception.

"It took a lot of sneaking but I'm surprised I pulled this off" Harry says so proud of himself with that damn smirk on his face.

I just wanna poke his dimple with my finger-

Katie no. Stop.

"I can't believe this, I'm so glad you're here!" I say hugging my mum again and with my chin resting on her shoulder I see Harry smiling fondly at us. I mouth a quick "thank you" and he gives me a little nod turning back to Anne.

I grew up with a single mum. My parents divorced when I was ten, and my dad moved to the states when he remarried. My parents had no bad blood, if anything they were better off friends. They still talk and I would visit my dad whenever I could. But my mum raised my sister Bella and I on our own while my dad was in America. She had a great job and was able to support us very well.

Harry was there for me for their divorce. His parents divorced when he was seven so he was able to understand what I was going through.

But, my parents were better off friends. Their relationship is one of the reasons I don't tell Harry how I feel. What if things work out in the beginning and then spiral causing us to believe we're just better off friends and living on opposite sides of the globe?

I'm not taking any chances.

My mum and Anne would always joke when Harry and I were little about how one day we would get married. And like I said it was always a joke.

"How are you?" my mum asks, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"I'm great, how are you? How's everything back home?" I ask

"I'm good and everything is ok back home, have you talked to Bella at all?"

My sister Bella was in the Military stationed somewhere in the Middle East, she couldn't give us her exact location. Being able to reach her became more and more difficult as time went by. Bella was busy fighting, I couldn't blame her.

"I haven't since last month, she's been busy," I say and I can feel the tension grow.

When my sister was thinking about joining, my mum was very against it. She was scared Bella would get hurt or even worse never return home. Before my sister left, my mum and her got into a huge fight and haven't talked since.

"You should call her mum," I say, trying to make this less tense.

"I'll try, I have to go talk to Anne, I'll see you in a bit" She says ending the conversation avoiding my advice.

Her and Anne are back to chatting and I'm currently trying to find where everyone is getting the champagne. I then see Harry at the bar in the green room pouring flutes with champagne and I make my way over.

"You wanna pour me a glass?" I ask leaning against the bar on my elbows.

"What's the magic word?" He asks me looking up at me as he opens another bottle of champagne.

He always does this.

"Please, can you please pour me a glass?" I am already losing my patience.

"Of course Kiwi you could have just said so," He says, sliding me a glass with that smirk permanently glued to his face.

"Thank you," I say, rolling my eyes.

"So everybody is going out after this to celebrate, you coming?" Harry asks as he sips from his glass as well.

"Yeah, might as well, it's everyone's last hurrah" I say looking out at everyone in the room.

When I look back and see Harry, he has his head hanging low and looking at the ground.

"What's wrong? Why are you so down?" I ask knowing he's gonna tell me.

"It's nothing Kie, I'm fine" He says avoiding looking in my eyes.

"Cut the bullshit, I know you, what's wrong?" I ask again.

"What if this is it?" he starts, "What if this is my last time performing? What if I never put out music again? What if-"

"You have got to stop with the 'what if's," I say, cutting him off. "Life is full of a lot of what ifs, but you have to look past those and just go for it."

"What if nobody likes it?" He asks, finally looking in my eyes like a sad puppy dog.

"If you're happy doing what you're doing, then nobody can tell you that you're unsuccessful," I say as I just look at my champagne, "Do this for yourself, you love music and it makes you happy, why let other people's opinions hold you back?" I say now looking up at him only to find his eyes are already on me. These are the moments where I think he's not oblivious to my feelings. But when he looks away, that is when my hope starts to fade.

He looks away and starts staring out into the crowd of people, "How do you always do this?" He asks, taking a sip of his champagne.

"Do what?" I say with a laugh.

"Always know exactly what to say?"

"Well I don't know, I guess I just have a way with words." I say smirking at him, making him laugh. "So are you gonna go out with everybody?" I ask.

"Yeah, I invited Kendall," He says nonchalantly and my whole body tenses. Envy spreading throughout my body. I like Kendall, she's actually really nice but I just wish that I was in her position. Being with Harry in the way I have always wanted.

"Oh," I say my voice going up in pitch, "That's great, haven't seen her in a while, didn't know she was in England"

"She's here for some job, I think with Burberry, I'm not sure," He says

Also she's a model, how can I possibly compete with that?

"Great, That's great," I say, my voice still high pitched. "I'm gonna go talk to my mum I'll see ya later" I say walking forward not waiting for him to respond and I chug the rest of the champagne and grab another glass.

If I'm going out tonight with everyone, I'm going to need some liquid courage.