I Belong to You Everyday

XVII

AUTHOR'S NOTE: 

Now I understand how you feel guys. This is stressing me out too. 

Enjoy~

CHAPTER 17

It's the day before Christmas. Even though majority of the people here in Thailand are Buddhist, they already embraced the culture of celebrating this event every twenty fifth of December. The feeling of excitement and joy when receiving a gift as soon as the clock strikes at twelve midnight is so priceless.

I would trade anything for me to experience that feeling again. Because this year, I'll be celebrating Christmas a little differently. I cannot feel the spirit anymore. I feel defeated, emotional, numb and angry.

Just like that, four days has been scrapped out. I have eight days, fifteen hours, thirty-four minutes and twelve seconds remaining.

Out sleep over didn't happen because Jumpol decided to take home Tay since he is still not having it.

When I went out of the bathroom, I can feel the grim aura of Tay and I guess he's really mad about that one.

None of them knows what I saw last night. Even my best friend whom I trust a lot, I cannot have the courage to tell her what happened because I don't want to ruin her Christmas.

It's already seven in the morning and sunny outside but my room is filled with darkness. I don't have the energy to open the curtains. I feel so weak that I might fall if I try to stand up. I am awake since last night because I cannot simply go to sleep.

Should I tell my parents, or should I not? That's what my mind is going through while staring at the ceiling of my room.

This is the first time in years that I'll be celebrating Christmas with them and all I have as a gift for them is telling my impending demise. I cannot go out last minute to buy anything because I am so preoccupied.

As soon as I recalled the image that I saw last night, I cannot help but to shed tears.

This is the first time that I don't know what to do.

If I managed to lost four days in a snap like that, how sure am I that I would not lost another four days or five any moment?

I didn't realize that I fell asleep while in that position. I woke up when I heard my phone ringing. When I recognized who's calling, I immediately answered it.

"Yes, mom."

"Did you just wake up? It's already three in the afternoon, honey." I guess she recognized my voice is still hoarse. "Well, we are on our way to your apartment and we'll have some last-minute shopping. Are you already out of your bed?"