Meant to Be - Akaashi K.

[ 57 ] Hope for the best

WARNING: mentions of sexual assault and abuse. 

The place you woke up in seemed dark and abandoned. It was a strangely dim-lit hallway, with no doors and no windows anywhere. And at the end of this hallway was one chair with a single light bulb above it.

It felt cold. The atmosphere seemed so chilly, and you could feel loneliness, hopelessness, and sadness radiate from where you stood. The place wasn't entirely creepy, but it didn't feel welcoming as well.

You examined yourself — bloody hands, in stained shirt and baggy jeans. If you recalled correctly, this was what you wore when you stopped by Kenma's mansion the night you ended things with Asano. But why were your hands and shirt all bloody?

Your mind was hazy. You weren't sure if you were awake, or if this was merely a dream. But it felt surreal. Everything was crystal clear despite how limited the things were around here. The hallway was narrow, too narrow for your liking. But at least there weren't any doors to confuse you. You only had one choice, and that was to reach the end of the hallway.

You slowly lifted your foot and started walking towards the lonesome armchair that sat right across you. Reaching your destination, you timidly took a seat and rested your arms on the bridges of the chair. Before you could even comfortably sit, there suddenly appeared locks around your ankles and your hands.

"What's happening?" You cry out, frightened by what had just happened. 

When you lifted your head and shifted your gaze from your ankles, you noticed the narrow hallway had disappeared. "What...?" You let out a shaky breath, looking around you to observe your surroundings.

You were in some kind of room. There was no one around, and the lights were flickering. The only things that were there was a long, metal table in front of you and a flat-screen TV that hung by the wall. It looked more like a room where the police interview people. It was nowhere near the cozy and homey vibe you were craving.

You suddenly heard static coming from the TV, making you dart your eyes at it. Your heart started beating fast when you heard a baby cry. "What the hell is happening...?" You questioned, but you immediately shut your mouth when you saw the face of your mother appear. "She's beautiful, Mrs. L/n." You heard someone say.

You squinted your eyes, attention now fully on the TV. You saw your mother crying, taking a hold of what you believed was you as a child. Your younger self started crying and you heard your mother shushing you and rocking you to sleep. She looked exhausted. That must have been when you were born.

The TV suddenly shifted "channels" and it showed you when you were about 3 years old. It was still in your younger self's perspective. You were in the park with your mother. You seemed to be enjoying yourself. 

It then shifted channels again, and this time, it was a memory you never wanted to remember. You flinched when you saw your father's hand clenched into a fist, swinging at you while your mother was on the floor, crying. The screen suddenly showed you at the ever familiar arms of a boy. "Rin..?" His name slipped out of your mouth when you saw him hug your much smaller self. Your mother was crying in the room and Rin's parents were talking with her. This memory was of that night you and your mother rushed to the police station to report your father.

The TV shifted channels once more. You saw the familiar layout of the room and realized it was one of those memories again. You heard grunts and low moans from the screen and you could feel your eyes start to burn. You remember this memory vividly. You were raped by your foster father. You forced yourself to turn away from the screen before you heard static again. You could feel your warm tears sliding down your cheeks. "Why is this happening..." You mumbled out. 

When you heard the static of the screen, you whipped your head around, curious yet afraid of what memory would appear. You could feel your heart being squeezed when you saw the comforting face of Akaashi. You were walking with him, hand-in-hand, on the way home. You remembered this clearly. He had a bad day in school and practice, and when he came to see you in your clubroom, he hugged you. You noticed his gloomy expression and offered to cuddle with him back in your apartment, which immediately brought him back to a good mood. 

As you were admiring him, the channels changed like it did the past four times already. You pursed your lips when the screen showed you in your apartment, with Rintarou and Akaashi arguing. "My journal.." You whispered when you saw yourself holding onto the large book. The screen skipped parts from that night and landed on the part where Rin kissed you and walked out the door. 

The TV started fast-forwarding some memories and you sat there, remembering each one very clearly. From the night of the argument, to the arcade where you had finally ended your relationship with Akaashi, to the night you received a call about Akaashi being in an accident, to the day in the aiport, where you last took a glimpse of Akaashi. 

The TV continued skipping parts in your earlier years of meeting Asano and stopped at one particular memory. 2 years ago, as you remember. It was one of those nights with Asano where he'd beat you and fucked you senseless till he's satisfied. You remembered this being your breaking point. You had purchased a ticket back to Japan and planned on seeing the boys again, and maybe even see Akaashi again. When you'd arrived, you made your way to your favorite café, only to witness Akaashi chuckling and holding hands with a girl you assumed was his girlfriend. You wearily laughed at yourself, "Stupid.." You whispered. 

A few more memories had passed before the TV finally shut off. Your heart was racing. Everything about this felt weird and wrong. You idly looked down to your hands and noticed the locks were gone, as well as the ones in your ankles. You let out a breath before standing up. "I'm not dead, am I?" You nervously laughed, eyeing your bloody shirt and hands. "This only ever happens to people who are dying. Their life flashes before their eyes."

"So this must be a dream... right?" 

"This is no dream." A voice appeared out of nowhere, filling the empty and quiet walls that surrounded you. You looked to where the voice had been and saw a fairly tall man draped in a black cloak. He didn't seem scary nor did he look dangerous in any way. You couldn't clearly see his face but the facial features were evident. "It's time, Child." He spoke in a way that made you seem... accepted. Welcomed. Loved. He was warm. There was no hint of bitterness in his voice. 

"No," You cried out, letting out a shaky breath. "I'm not dead. T-this can't be. I-I can't be dead!" You ran to him and fell on your knees. "P-please. There's so much I still want to do." You started sobbing uncontrollably. "I still have to make up with Rintarou a-and make memories with the twins."

"I still have Hiroshi to tend to, a-and Bokuto and Akaashi! Oh God, Keiji... I still have to tell him how I truly feel before I leave. Please! P-please there has to be another way!" You grabbed onto the hem of his cloak, sobbing.

Suddenly, you felt something strong pulling you. It pulled you in like the ocean's current. "Clear!" You faintly heard a voice echo around the room before feeling another strong pull. "Clear!" Once more, and another pull, but this time, stronger.

"We'll meet again, Child." You looked up to the tall man whose cloak you were holding in your hands, and saw his sweet smile. "I hope not as soon."

-

"Clear!" The doctor yelled, putting the defibrillator on your chest, shocking your body.

Akaashi was right outside the room, hearing the doctor's voice echo towards the door. He was on the floor, knees glued to his chest, forehead rested on his knees, arms shielding him from the world while he sobbed quietly. "She'll be fine." Atsumu crouched down to him, putting a hand on his shoulder. 

"Let's just hope for the best." Bokuto spoke aloud.